Been the longest time in bed,
Just comforting her nerves with the warmth of her blanket,
Maybe it being winter makes it easier,
It's almost like an excuse from the biting cold. Winters make bed-ins seem okay, acceptable.
The kitchen only sees her when she stumbles in there with swollen eyes to make herself a coffee that she drinks so slowly it tastes ugh by the time she finishes it. With all her time gone to empty thoughts who could blame the coffee.
She always had messed up hair, and she now seems to not care much either because she has not stepped out in days. Who's judging? The steady sound of the fan over her head? The television that's on mute but always switched on?
Mindless, senseless scrolling on the Explore section of instagram, hoping she'd find something interesting but all food videos, makeup videos, vines, memes, musically's etc etc etc seem to just bring in more sleep.
Lost count of how many hours she slept,
20/24 hrs yesterday, something similar day before.
Did she sleep or just lie there in daze, a long haze?
She typed a post on instagram, realised it was about her, also realised nobody would read and give two shits about it. Posted it anyway. Who cares about being judged? Everyone judges anyway.
Zero mistakes in last few months and still in pain, make mistakes and you're still in pain, she still can't pull herself out of that bed and go out, feel the sun, warm those bones. Maybe this is depression she thought to herself. Pulled up d blanket and hazed out again.