Each time I know,
That this will end the same way everything else does
I still don't try to fight, for I can't let go of the transient happiness
That it brings me
Even if it is
For those very few unprecedented moments.
And each time I fool myself
Into believing that this is new,
I am not not very smart.
I forget about all the other times when I was deceived,
Such is the hunger of being understood,
Of being loved.
I'm not surprised
For after a certain point you get used to the disappointment.
My feelings prey on me,
My sensitivity murdering me,
My heart deceives me
And as much as it all hurts,
It reminds me that I'm alive
Capable of feeling,
Fighting and losing,
And then trying again
In hopes that someday perhaps I'll lose to a person who has been deceived as much as I, myself am!