37 posts
  • niccolelynne 2d

    I cannot help but wonder
    Who I would have become

    If nothing had happened
    When I was a child

    Had I experienced
    Love instead of pain,

    Comforted rather
    Than set aside;

    Perhaps I would be a
    Better person than I am now.

    Or maybe I would
    Be even worse off.


  • niccolelynne 3d

    How worthless are you if it's impossible to earn your mother's love?


  • niccolelynne 2w

    "It gets better."

    What if it doesn't?


  • poojanatoo 2w

    As the first streaks of sunlight filled the sky
    She tucked the box of his memories aside

    Taken out again from it's hidden corner
    When her soundless cries filled the night!!

  • niccolelynne 4w

    As the tale goes, you're born into a loving family; one who wants you and believes in you. They support your decisions, and offer aid when it's needed. They're always around to listen, and are willing to accept on your problems as their own.

    What happens, if that isn't really the case at all?

    Some of us are welcomed into broken homes - abused day in, day out. Neglect runs high, and feeling wanted is not a necessity. Alone for each decision made, left to fend for yourself. Their problems are always yours, and you aren't to speak.

    Healing from your childhood shouldn't be a part of life.


  • niccolelynne 4w

    Each day is a battle,
    One I no longer desire to face.

    As I carry on down this path,
    The light at the end starts to quiver.

    My body and mind are numb,
    While my heart cries itself to sleep.

    I have looked high and low
    For something to hold on to;

    Empty hands, no such luck.
    It wasn't meant to be.


  • niccolelynne 4w

    Before my mother faded away, her father had visited her in a dream; telling her that they would meet shortly if she didn't take care of herself.

    The same thing happened to her father, with his mother.

    Last night, I had a dream of her. She sat me down, and told me that if I didn't start taking care of myself, we would meet in less than a year.

    I have never been so motivated to abuse my body.


  • niccolelynne 6w

    Closer, closer, closer.
    Can never get enough of you.

    Shall I let my demons out to play?
    You may not look at me the same

    Once you witness them.
    They don't take well with others.


  • niccolelynne 6w

    Coming from the suicidal, it sure isn't the latter.

    #showerthoughts #depression #suicide

    Read More

    When asked, most will tell you that suicide is selfish; a lasting solution to a temporary problem.

    They don't understand what it feels like to wake up each day, wishing they didn't.

    To which I retort with - what is worse; forcing someone to continue to live a life they no longer want to, solely because "it gets better" or allowing them to end their pain how they choose, as there may be no other way?

    Suffering isn't fun.


  • niccolelynne 9w

    Suicide is for the coward, or at least, it's looked at as such. Those such extreme labels come into play when there's a lack of knowledge, understanding.

    No one can ever seem to wrap their head around suicide; what could possibly drive one to take their own lifetime?

    Maybe it's a lack of hope. The weight of the past pulling them under the surface. Uncertainty for the future.

    Perhaps, they're tired of facing the same day time and time again.. Waking up only to be in a place they don't belong.. Where they receive little to no support.. Struggling to make a change, only to be reminded of their former ways.. Because they feel like the world would be better off without them.

    The understanding needs to be found in the reasoning behind it, or more valuable lives will be lost.

  • niccolelynne 9w

    A compassionate soul, one that oozes kindness. A shoulder to weep on, strong arms that never let go. A warm hand to hold, soft lips that brush the hairline. A cozy body to nuzzle up to on a bad day, a challenging mind when asked. Empathy when the waves grow, and silence once the storm settles. Motivation and inspiration; determination would be a bonus.

    In return;
    All of the above, and unconditional love.

  • niccolelynne 9w

    Still living in the past,
    Each day brings something new.

    A fear of something that was
    Once so familiar.

    The hatred for something,
    once dearly held.

    Guilt of memories
    That once brought laughter.

    Digging through the grit
    Uncoveres some rather ugly surprises.


  • niccolelynne 9w

    Shut your filthy trap,
    Keep everything inside.

    How you feel doesn't matter,
    And no one cares about your opinions.

    Hide away,
    Do the world a favor.

    How can you stand to live with yourself
    With such a pathetic existence?


  • niccolelynne 10w

    Dreamless slumber.
    Soft snores heard from the other room.

    Peaceful, serene bliss.
    Not a care or worry in the world.


  • niccolelynne 10w

    A piece of the puzzle,
    That will never go.

    The screw that always,
    Needs a special bit.

    The squeaky wheel on a
    Shopping cart being pushed aside.

    The lack of a rhyme
    For the word orange.

    As all these things are out of place,
    My existence is just the same.


  • niccolelynne 10w

    Gullible is my middle name. I wear my heart on my sleeve, and always believe what others tell me. That stems down to my past, and having experienced things that isn't the easiest to believe.. But by being this way, I allow myself to get hurt. Constantly Quite often, I find myself in the arms of somebody who is toxic - to me and themselves - and can't let go. No matter how hard I may try, and no matter how much I know they're not right for me.. It would be nice to finally meet somebody who wouldn't take advantage of me.


  • niccolelynne 10w

    Being the survivor of incest has drastically affected my life. My soul has been shattered and my identity taken from me. Some days, I feel as if the only thing to me if the fact that I am a survivor. The nights are haunted by nightmares that are promptly forgotten. Days lived in a zombie state; no energy and guilt holding me back. Some days, I feel as if it would be more beneficial if I wasn't alive; I would not longer have to deal with what I do, and my burdens would no longer inconvenience those around me.. Some days, I wish I was given a different life.


  • niccolelynne 10w


    No pain, guilt, or sorrow.



  • niccolelynne 10w

    My mind, a muddle;
    Thoughts turn over and over.

    Begging me to quit;
    To give up, before it gets tough again.

    Telling me that I'm wrong;
    I have no worth, I am not important.

    Laughing at me,
    When I struggle and break.

    My mind, a place
    I'd sooner avoid.


  • niccolelynne 11w

    Deep within my heart,
    A small voice whispers.

    It encourages me greatly,
    And cheers me on.

    Without that voice,
    I may not be here at all.

    I am, however, worried;
    As the others are slowly silencing it.