Waves in Chaos
The waves inside my mind
Are stuck in a vortex,
Being thrown up
Back up again
My heart beats in a rhythmic flow
In tune with the waves...
Bombarding me with chaos.
I struggle to find a place of peace,
To find the calm waters
Where I can float like a feather
Gently touching the ocean surface
Gliding along day after day
As the sun kisses my skin golden
Leaving a sparkle in my eye
As I rise from the waters,
Instead the chaos ensues.
Burdens are placed on my chest,
Pressuring tears to purge from my eyes,
Watering my face in unwanted emotions,
As I lay here in this place,
In this time,
In this world.
Have you ever felt like you were just existing?
People look through you and
Not at the person you really are...
It is like they stare at you for so long
That you start to blur in their minds eye..
You start to become a mirage.
Or a dream all together.
Sometimes I wish I was invisible.
No one can hurt you when you don't exist.
Tears will not flow,
Hearts will not break,
Emotions will not cascade down upon your soul,
Killing what is left of you.
The winds blows past my face,
Kissing the pale skin in a soft embrace,
My red hair swings towards her,
Longing to feel the sweet tenderness it holds.
Hoping it comes back this way one more time,
For memories sake.
I'm lost in the chaos.
Mind shifting this way and that,
Wishing people could see me,
See past the outside
Looking into the woman I truly am.
Would they care?
Would they run away?
Would it matter anymore then as it does now?
I searched my heart for the answers,
Understanding nothing more or less,
Wishing my heart was open,
For it's desires to manifest.
Tears roll down my face,
Leaving my soul bare.
The winds will stop blowing
Chaos will ease.
Love will emerge from the ashes,
And walk towards me.
Sknee July 7, 2019