#venting

49 posts
  • fi_dha 4d

    Limerance

    Dopamine overdrive.
    You light up my nerve endings.
    If i could just find a word,as to call what this is?
    I am strangely calm amidst the chaos.
    Love? Too simple a word to describe this array of haywire thoughts.
    More like a craving,to quench the thirst for the unfathomable you.
    Writing the same lines over and over again.
    Some times you are the moon,or the glowing sun.
    Epitome of perfection at times,or a curveball of all rough edges other times.
    The soul in my words never changes,it's undoubtedly you,forever.
    ©fi_dha

  • fi_dha 1w

    You still are,at the highest pedestal of my musings.
    I've seen your eyes wander,go places,i don't ever want them to.
    But tired i am,to stretch my hands,for you never heed,
    The calls my heart make,however loud they are.
    Now i muffle them,the sun is about to set in the horizon.
    Time flew away,without any remorse,taking away my peace.
    I waited,waited,but my fire has burned out.
    I don't have it in me to burn,in the intensity of my love.
    I've become a mess of charred emotions,crushed and torn apart.
    And i know,you won't turn up to undo my wreckage.
    ©fi_dha

  • ashleym1991 1w

    I envy the sky how it can be dark
    And beautiful all at once.
    And when it rains, it pours out
    Every drop...
    The evidence drys on the ground,
    But the sky has no sign of sadness
    Left.
    ©ashleym1991

  • musingsofthebodhi 3w

    Isolated Storms

  • _riggy_ 3w

    I guess our dreams were only mine
    What a fool it seems I am.
    To think of all the years I helped him
    Achieve all his objectives and dreams
    Waiting for ours to come into play
    The time is here and he's pushed away.
    When all along I thought we had the same goals to achieve, however something better has caught his eye.  Our dreams of having a child seems to die. He no longer thinks ivf is worth as much as his new wants. He wants a new car,  he will only drive; its important? Fml... This doesn't feel right, after supporting all his needs
    I'm left feeling blind.
    I never wanted anything more
    but here my dream stand no more.
    I won't force this on him, I won't be his regret and to think with all his tattoos he still can't hold his commitments.

    ©_riggy_

  • maroshka 6w

    01:08 a.m.

    I wanna make love to you
    Wake up next to you
    Share my deep thoughts
    And silliness with you

    But you're so far away
    And I'm right over here
    You still believe in life
    But my faith has long disappeared

    ©maroshka

  • sorryximxtalking 7w

    "Unhinged."
    Childhood: Sexual Abuse..Sorry, I'm Talking. **WARNING MAY CAUSE TRIGGERS**

    Redirected & carelessly thrusted apart from sanity, disturbingly beckoned by familiars & overburdened psychologically resorting to unhinging. Relative's clustering skin particles exploiting & possessing my once pure tissues, innocence disrupted forever now inaccessible.
    Household carelessly boozing fully Loaded with spirits, whilst corpselike wine & beer containers littered collect enclosing my childhood in Hades.
    Isolated socially secondly emotionally, in addition cognitively unwell & overwhelmingly disassociated. Secret fiendish urges & demented low-minded behaviors, as If the unbecoming & violating sexual games made mandatory for me as a child.. left a diabolical & hideous morbid stain ghoulishy fixed alongside my shadow. My bag of crippled bones unwelcomely altered impure, now fully grown & eager to fill my blackened heart with sleazy stimulations similar to the way my family did.
    ©sorryximxtalking

  • thankyoulordgod 8w

    Memories of A Lesbian Vet (1)

    This thought popped into my head, so I figured maybe writing it SOMEWHERE would help clear space.

    Just before deploying to Afghan, my unit went to train in Louisiana. I was 19 and because I grew up pretty sheltered, let's just say there are a lot of things I just didn't catch on to. One day I was leaving the chow hall and this sergeant begins shouting in my direction. As I'm walking by I see him glaring at me so I'm thinking 'wtf???'. He yells "stop playing I'm trying to talk to you, I'll even give you my bank card". Everyone around him began laughing all sergeants including a female NCO as well. I just smirked shook my head and kept walking. I guess I get stuck on the fact that I didn't think anything of it. I'm not that person anymore, now I know better.

    ©thankyoulordgod

  • ato1029 8w

    "A FIGHT"

    Sorry about our fight last night,
    Both of us frustrated and mad,
    Things were said back and forth,
    With words that made us sad,
    Missing the person I used to be,
    Not only you but the same for me,
    This strange woman that I've become
    I cannot be any more,
    Time for me to end this craziness
    An close this revolving door,
    Meeting me I was your everything
    In spite of challenges you knew for sure,
    It's time for me to get back on my feet
    And start making decisions that aren't so poor,
    An entire week of not seeing you,
    Well cause my heart to turn blue,
    Please understand the stress I can be under,
    When my anxiety hits it sounds like Thunder,
    Being exactly what we need,
    Together all the time has caused us greed,
    Taking advantage of the time that we had,
    But, too much of it can cause can cause us to go bad,
    Some of the words you spoke were true,
    I'm so sorry if you only knew,
    To be me again will take a bit of time,
    Please don't look at this poem like it's a stupid rhyme,
    I'll fix everything you will see,
    In the process don't forget to make time for me.
    BY: TARALYNN ZAGROSKI ~ATO
    ©ato1029

  • saroura 8w

    I needed some music to die to.
    That reminds me of the calm you're supposed to feel sinking to the bottom of the ocean.
    Music that reminded me of long bus journeys and watching the rain fall.
    That reminded me of the smell of hot asphalt in the summer
    The hot pavements and polluted air.
    That smell you can't quite describe after acid rain.
    Not all that pretty stuff.
    The real stuff that others take for granted.
    The feeling of pages of a book slipping between your fingers
    The quiet and life that's in city noise
    That buzz that's always around that makes wherever you go familiar.
    yeah
    that's the kinda music I need.
    The blankets on a cold night music
    grass rash on freshly shaved legs.
    Washing powder and detergent on clothes,
    getting into bed after changing the sheets
    New socks.
    I need that kind of music.
    ©doleomea

  • maroshka 10w

    For a split of a second
    She was happy
    Truely, genuinely happy
    But suddenly
    Everything came back
    The memories
    The pain
    The reasons why she wanted to disappear
    And never come back again
    Happiness isn't meant for her
    It never was
    And it never will be

    ©maroshka

  • loftydreams101 14w

    A Confession Penned in Red Ink

    I slid a knife across my stomach 
    Before a wide-eyed tribe,
    They spoke among themselves 
    In rapid whispers 

    I set the blade aside 
    And unraveled 
    In pulsing shades of red,
    They recoiled from the truth

    So I bled out and spoiled 
    In open display,
    Draining 
    To the rapid fire of gossip 

    Distressed 
    No one wrestled the blade away
    From my guilty hands,  
    Before the knife broke my skin

    © William Wright, Jr. 2018

  • your_aatma 16w

    Scandalous Endeavors of an Idle Heart

    Stupid heart!
    That bidi won't cure your racing thoughts.
    Those messages won't undo what's past.
    What are you doing?
    NO!

    Like a soothsayer, he sounds.
    'Milord', you had called him,
    In passion or sobreity.
    Hands, you couldn't control... His or yours.
    Touched, rapturously, remember?

    You played like a toddler on a swing,
    Not forseeing the hurt of the fall.
    You couldn't understand.
    He couldn't understand.
    But, you needed him nestled in your arms.

    You yearned for a tug at his beard;
    His breath on your ears; his silence.
    Remember the mirror? Yes, the mirror.
    When he felt you up, both in birthed glory,
    Like a sculptor does - electric, ecstatic.

    It's all come back. Apologies accepted.
    Yet, you don't want more; can't have more.
    See what happens! Can't you feel the burst?
    When you won't let bygones go, even
    Your favorite chocolate will lost it's charm.

    ©aatma_the_logophile

  • your_aatma 16w

    Scandalous Endeavors of an Idle Heart

    Stupid heart!
    That bidi won't cure your racing thoughts.
    Those messages won't undo what's past.
    What are you doing?
    NO!

    Like a soothsayer, he sounds.
    'Milord', you had called him,
    In passion or sobreity.
    Hands, you couldn't control... His or yours.
    Touched, rapturously, remember?

    You played like a toddler on a swing,
    Not forseeing the hurt of the fall.
    You couldn't understand.
    He couldn't understand.
    But, you needed him nestled in your arms.

    You yearned for a tug at his beard;
    His breath on your ears; his silence.
    Remember the mirror? Yes, the mirror.
    When he felt you up, both in birthed glory,
    Like a sculptor does - electric, ecstatic.

    It's all come back. Apologies accepted.
    Yet, you don't want more; can't have more.
    See what happens! Can't you feel the burst?
    When you won't let bygones go, even
    Your favorite chocolate will lost it's charm.

    ©aatma_the_logophile

  • rebirth2018 21w

    Venting#1

    Looking back at time
    As I stare at the night sky
    Being a rogue star
    Feeling like a alien of this world
    Were love is replaced with lust
    Loyalty is with more than one person
    What is marriage in 2018
    I forgot the meaning of the word
    I just know it's something of the short term..

    Ah.....Another drink is poured...

    I'm looking at the night sky
    Like why am I here?
    I've been suicidal ever since
    I opened my eyes to the blind
    That's why I drink hard liquor
    Black hole inside me of my own creation
    I shouldn't be living with fear
    But what can you do
    Without a support & guidance system
    I'm just aiming for whatever knowing the reality I don't have the right tools to build.

    Tobacco smoke.....


    I can't blame my parents
    Because they didn't see my potential
    So many friends but our relationship is all artificial
    Because they ain't never there when I need them..
    My family ain't even close
    Last time I spoke to my bro we spoke for 5 mins he was so quick to judge..

    Funny thing I never really judge him
    Sad thing about it I used to look up to him
    If blood is thicker than water than tell me why
    I've been through harsher shit with friends and they never cut me off their life
    Like he did me.
    Our relationship is fragile as sh*t
    Last time we fought it was over a hat
    That was straight bullsh*t
    Forget a rhythm scheme
    I'm spitting too many facts
    My emotions are overwhelming my thought process
    I'm over-thinking ahh.. I hate being my worst critic.

    Venting #1

  • _riggy_ 23w

    Maybe I'm not good enough for him?

    You have a bestfriend/ gf/bf .
    you find out months before the event
    that your favorite dj is playing in a club near you,
    wouldn't you want to share that experience with your bestfriend/gf/bf?
    Or at lest extend the invite?


    He announced to me that he might be going in a few weeks to a club downtown to see his favorite DJ with no invitation to me I bluntly asked "can I come?" then he backpedaled and said he doesn't even know if he's going yet.

    I feel so hurt and have been obsessing about this moment for far too long I'm not going to be one of those girls who sits at home while her man's in a club but I have however watched him leave for 4 days while he went to what they call music festivals / Raves I always want to go and make it clear but never get the invite.

    I use to feel like i was his everything, I have an autoimmune disease and he plays it off that that's the reason why I can't participate however I tell him even if he thinks that I cannot handle it; it should really be my decision and even just an invitation would be nice yet I never get one, when it comes to Celebration excitement and nights out I'm not included

    Recently after a disappointing birthday for myself, I have decided that this can no longer be okay and the anticipation of when the next event or moments that he decides he's going somewhere is overwhelming my everyday thoughts.

    I don't understand how a person can mean so much to somebody but yet is not good enough to be involved in the good times, in the Epic experiences and what not I'm starting to feel like he's ashamed of me.

    don't get me wrong we do go out to his work wife's house for a barbecue now and then and for small get-togethers with his work family but when it comes to going out on the town I'm never included.

    I'm starting to look in the mirror and wonder how I can improve myself I'm starting to lay longer in bed wondering why I'm not enough and I'm starting to realize that maybe I'm just not what he wants.




    ©_riggy_

  • emjayem 31w

    I sit searching the bottom of these bottles for the answers you won't give me.

  • welivetowander 34w

    Drifter's Melancholy

    Confusion. Sadness. Yearning. Resignation.

    The ingredients of such a bittersweet toxin coursing through my veins, encompassing my inner-being. Each strand of this concoction like the creeping hand of permafrost slowly wrapping me in its deathly embrace.

    It is a numb pain.

    There are no searing waves of heat and hurt, no indications of life and struggle, only the deep cold is felt, as if the bone biting winds of a frozen tundra beating down upon a solitary traveler was captured and placed within my spirit.

    It is a lonely pain.

    This chilling cold within my very blood offers no salvation, no companionship, no absolution, only the stoic smile of the fatal end is left to greet me, and with it, the encroaching darkness from the corner of my vision.

    It is a tenebrous pain.

    The vestiges of light that remain within my frozen world unveil a theatre of white falling from the sunless sky. Slowly they dance, their million rhythms conducted by the slow breeze of winter’s skillful hand. Steadily they fall to the ground, performing their final act, their only audience the faded eyes of a lifeless soul.

    It is a pain nevermore.

    ©welivetowander

  • gratialetitgo 49w

    Tension today built up quite a lot (Story Time)

    So pretty much i'm just going to be venting about what happened today and maybe later delete this i don't know

    So today the bully started up again only this time he got a bit more annoying rude and flat out mean. He kept on saying how i smell like a fucking fish tank when i don't even have fish he then afterwords found some nerf darts and thought of throwing them at me. He even mentioned that if he had a rubber band he would of threw it at me. I got so pissed i thought of just beating the mess out of him but i held it back preventing myself from loosing my cool he even made a comment at me saying that if i held him at knife point he would "break my neck" when i never fucking said or did anything to him. At that time none of my friends you can say were in class so i was pretty much alone. As for this fuck boy he had his friends around and all they did was fucking laugh especially one in particular i almost wanted to fight as well. The teacher told him time and time again to stop but he wouldn't i just wish he was kicked the fuck out of summer school already. He has started shit with some of the other students and some of them feel the same way i do. I'm not scared of this bully nor do i even give a fuck anymore what he does but i just cant beat the mess out of him due to the fact that i know the consequences and either way i know i'm fucked i just have to survive this week and the next 2 days then it'll all be over for now.

  • dchhavi 51w

    When you have the passion and the fire, you go on without holding back on the world. Unleashing yourself, and it is too much. Too much for them that they back away afraid of the fire.

    And yet you keep your heart frozen. Frigid in place and a heavy piece in you, driving your fire out by the cold in your heart. Such is the paradox.

    #pod #mirakee #writersofmirakee #writersnetwork #readwriteunite #heartfelt #latenightwritten #venting

    Read More

    Paradoxical Her

    She is fire outside
    Burning bright
    Inferno to touch
    Blinding too much

    Setting aflame
    Everything she touches
    Nothing saved
    In her clutches

    But inside its cold
    Like the ice ages old
    Her heart frozen
    Her actions brazen

    Passion
    Is what fuels her
    The truth
    Is what cools her.

    A thing to behold,
    A person out of mold.
    She is
    Paradoxical, love.

    ©dchhavi