VIII.II.MMV ❤ // messed up //

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  • khushu_ 11m

    I am not good at writing such long posts but I tried because I am feeling this right now
    See, I never wanted to hurt you. I ignored you just because everytime I speak something, I hurt people. I don't want you to get hurted. You think I do not care
    But I do. Every time I pass from your house, I check if you reached safely or not? Then from my balcony I check if you slept well or not.

    I radiate positive energy as much I can,but I myself am filled with veins that have negative thoughts flowing in them. I trick my brain everytime I smile. But I am afraid darling, that one day at a certain point you'll lose me. But I still dwell on those pics you know? That picture haunts me every night. Those 2 a.m. conversations of ours. How your sleepy red eyes never closed and stared at me lovingly. I left you not because I stopped loving you,but because,I had hurted you like hell.

    I never stopped loving you. Everytime your eyes set upon mine, I sensed love and compassion for me. And I always tried be positive you know,around you and your friends,but then when the clock striked on those numbers 2 and 12 (2:00) my mind overflowed with disappointment. I am not disappointed with you dear,am disappointed of what I have become now. How many people's life I have ruined,including myself.

    And now my poetry may read sweet as sugar. But you see,everyone believes sugar coated lies. Leaving you may seem a piece of cake for you,but it was like walking on a floor full of nails. The dawn may seem beautiful to you but darling, my mind is covered with so dark thoughts that have seen dawn of hope and my void isn't familiar with light!
    // But Everyone believes sugar coated lies //

    Pic credit- to the rightful owner

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    I may sound like a sweet music to your ears but listen my lyrics and you'll understand the pain behind!

  • khushu_ 3d

    You read me like your favourite book
    You studied me like your favourite subject
    You loved me like you loved your life
    And now you are mine till the eternity and I love you more than anything else!

  • khushu_ 4d

    She is a soul that is sparkling poetry
    Her eyes,grey and melancholy
    Have killed many other souls
    And brought them into ashes
    // She slays with her eyes //

    She is that song with soothing vibes
    Everyone wants to hear,but few to feel
    A song,once heard it'll keep echoing
    In your heart..
    // She plucks the strings of your heart //

  • khushu_ 1w

    // I am heartless // ����

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    People say correct
    I am
    H-E + A-R-T + L-E-S-S
    You are that art, I haven't mastered yet!

  • khushu_ 1w

    Let's see if this is worth a read ....
    @mirakee @writersnetwork #pod

    Everything is hurting....
    Everything sucks...

    That day she told me
    My love will be colourful
    And I'll paint your canvas with the most beautiful colours
    A modern art,will be our love
    Yet her lips trembled while saying "I love you"
    Was she having something else in her mind?

    I remember her hearing that song in loop
    "I'll never love again" by Lady Gaga
    She often said
    Life is a cacophony,it is chaotic,it is messy
    But sometimes it's worth hearing!
    Was her life messy because of me?

    At 2 a.m. she sat in my balcony
    Stargazing. She asked me
    "Do you know why I love nights?"
    I had no answer
    She replied, "Because that's when the cacophonous sound is clearer to me"
    "Because that's when I feel like confessing"
    What did she want to confess?

    On a cold winterday, she told me
    "PAIN is like a virus and I am the host who has given a permanent home to it"
    "I hate love she said!"
    That day, I could see her eyes drowning in the pain.
    I could see fear rather than love in her eyes

    I wish, I could have realised
    She feared love
    She feared that she would lose me
    All she wished was those silly fights to continue
    A history so horrible she had,
    She wanted a perfect present with me
    She forgot about the future,she forgot love.
    She didn't want to accept that she had already fallen

    How she feared loneliness,how she lost her life
    Death lay its icy hands on her
    That day, when she finally confessed her fear
    She flew away from her own cage of thoughts
    She was finally free from her own mighty murderous misunderstandings!

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  • khushu_ 1w

    Writers block is that song which continuously keeps on haunting and lingering in my mind...
    A song with "not-so-good" vibes....

  • khushu_ 1w

    Celebrating one year at mirakee! ❤❤
    I feel so happy ....
    Thank you so much everyone for your constant love and support! ����

    When I was 3 years old

    I saw
    An 8 year old girl laughing and brimming with happiness
    How her mother waited for her near the slide
    And that smile that could simply melt anyone's heart
    That I thought was real B-L-I-S-S

    When I was 10 years old

    I saw
    A beautiful teenager who battled her life
    How she gathered money to help her mom survive
    And how brave she was, never showed tears in her eyes
    She worked every single day and studied hard
    That I thought was real H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K

    When I was 15 year old

    I saw
    An adult who mourned the loss of her beloved mom
    How she learned to live without her mom
    And how she talked to her mom's picture every night
    She grew up very early and started working
    That I thought was real C-O-U-R-A-G-E

    When I was 20 years old

    I saw
    A successful business woman
    Who proudly said "hardwork pays"
    And how her eyes glinted with that rare happiness
    How she dedicated everything to her mother
    She is truly an inspiration and a deserving woman
    That I realised how it goes on- L-I-F-E
    -Khushi modi
    @mirakee @writersnetwork #mirakee #writersnetwork #pod

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    She deserves respect
    She deserves love
    She deserves happiness
    She deserves everything...
    She is a woman and she deserves every single happy moment...

  • khushu_ 2w

    // I hope you give a perfect retribution //


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  • khushu_ 2w

    Undress my soul darling
    You'll understand my mess
    An illusion that will leave you in delusion

    Open my diary darling
    You'll lose yourself in my messed verses
    A poesy so poignant that will leave you awestruck

    Visit me in darkness Darling
    You'll realise that I can live in solidarity
    A flower that learnt to grow in the dark I am

    Kiss my soul darling
    You'll realise that I am a devil inside an angelic face
    An angel that once had a beautiful story with a 'not-so-happy-ending'
    // Leave or stay, my words will always slay //

    @mirakee @writersnetwork

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    Visit me in darkness Darling
    You'll realise that I can live in solidarity
    A flower that learnt to grow in the dark I am

  • khushu_ 3w

    @mirakee @writersnetwork #pod #aftertaste
    Special thanks to Shawn mendes... Love ya! ❤��

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    Those blemishes that I hid before
    That betrayal that hit in my heart's core
    I don't try to forget them
    I try to leave everything and erase 'em
    All it takes me is one perfect kiss
    For you to experience the aftertaste of betrayal
    Believe me,this kiss won't let you experience bliss
    A perfect one,to have an aftertaste of perfidy
    I'll be alive in your memories
    Maybe or maybe not.
    But I hope you pay a perfect retribution
    That you'll be left with nothing but regret
    Don't come to be forgiven
    I am gonna move on
    Leaving you with those trenches,lakes,rivers with memories there...
    You'll laugh,you'll smile-when you see me in your memories
    But darling, I know you would regret
    Because "I am permanent and you can't erase me!"
    Broken yet beautiful, you would regret for all the mistakes
    I would not forgive you
    Neither I would let you forget me
    'Coz darling
    "One more kiss is all it takes
    To leave you with a memory and the aftertaste!"

    // I'll leave with a kiss and a life without any bliss! //