I like languages..silence is my favorite

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  • nocturnal_muse_ 2d

    I am sick of this disease people have named
    It's neither is killing me nor lets me live
    Just eating me bit by bit and forming its lesions on me.
    I am struggling now to get its salve called 'Hope'.
    These days it frequently remains out of stock!


  • nocturnal_muse_ 3d

    According to Heisenberg uncertainty principle the position and velocity of an object cannot be determined at the same time.

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    Nobody else anywhere can feel the exact thing you do.
    Whatever they may say. However, they may empathise. It's not possible for anybody to feel you. Neither is it possible for you to feel them (the exact way).

    So be kind to yourself.

    You are the only one alive for you, Who actually knows the struggle of your own survival.
    Your strength is the true source for your existence.
    You are worth. And you know it.

    Stop running to others. Home is in you.

  • nocturnal_muse_ 4d

    To my first teacher. I only have gratitude. But sorry i know i have failed you.

    Some part are fiction : either the plot or the emotions

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    The choice we did not inherit

    When was the last time you hugged
    Guess I was 8 that time
    You used to tell me stories at night
    I use to curl and sleep by your side
    Why the time did not stop clicking then
    After that night nothing remained the same
    You stopped telling me stories
    And stopped listening to mine
    When was the last time mom you asked me "what happened my child?"
    Did you not wondered even for once
    Why I have stopped asking questions?

    I know you tried to save
    You did save me
    From getting my freedom
    From learning to be spoken
    From allowing to share
    From allowing to care

    How you did not notice your ever so blabbering child
    Have turned all so silent!
    You are the observant one, isn't it?
    You always have corrected my mistakes
    When I ate
    When I slept late
    When I say something filthy
    When I dressed up little fiercely (I know you hate kohl that I wear)
    If only for once, had you eyed
    The times I stopped asking permissions
    When going out and coming in late was no longer a part of my mission
    When I enjoyed sleeping late in the mornings
    When you saw me eating calmly at the dining
    When I stopped telling you about the clothes I buy from
    When I started living more on the junk than fun
    Why I never look in your eyes when I talk
    Afraid that the mother in you might still know somehow to read what's hidden

    You said I was not cute, as a baby
    I heard it as "you look pretty as a lady"
    Your sarcasm is something I too have inherited
    Maybe this silence too was a recessive gene which in me have dominated
    I took a lot from you
    To love, even I am resilient
    To hurt, even I act to be resistant
    And so we both write poetries in secret
    That the only thing I am happy I inherited

    I know we both are very similar
    That's something I have grown to learn
    But I don't want to end up like you
    The sacrifices you made
    And allowing yourself to be taken for granted
    I know you deserved a better stay
    Just like me
    But it's too late
    And you brought me, in this ugly maze
    I see you hurt
    I see you stranded
    But I also see it's you who chose not to escape
    I don't want to be like you
    I don't want to lose my space
    So I dwell at places
    Which I wish you too should have tried to chase
    I see you staring at nothingness
    I see you staring at me
    I wish you had seen me crying
    At the places where I showed my grin

    You giggle with other kids
    Mom in you sometimes do make a peep
    Why doesn't she smile seeing me?
    What did I do mom?
    Where did I go wrong?
    To take you away from me

    Maybe I grew up
    Like you even I hate this full stop

    I wish for once you tried to know
    Why is what I do and everything for
    I tried to know you too
    Is it too much to expect mom?
    In all this mess we could have survived together
    If only for once
    you chose to give me a hug than your distance

    When all say they love their mom
    They write poetries and post stories of their fun
    Even I wish to say it to you at least for once

    It's too late now mom
    It's too late and Like you, I too have forgotten the use of verbs


  • nocturnal_muse_ 5d

    Missed you (28/05/2019)

    How should I tell you?
    Tried every combination of these words
    But have I not failed miserably?
    These muses make no sense
    The rhymes are choking to an end
    How desperately I wish I had that magic wand
    The one I use to wave in my dreamland
    The times when I fought with my demons single hand
    But then you armed me with your embrace
    That was the last time I saw those demons melt
    It was warm as daylight
    And I need it again now when you are out of sight
    The nights are long and this cold got my heart froze
    I hoped you will return, for it needs your warm hold
    Even the stars laughed at my yearning face
    They all told me this is a lost chase
    I barked back and kept my pace
    My heart pleaded while it got torn
    The blood echoed an empty mourn
    It flushed every corner resonating a horror
    I was chasing a new demon dressed as a knight in golden armour
    Stranded again in a place of familiar dread
    Screaming your name while fate’s laughter hit me bad
    Crumpled to the ground while this cold darkness welcomed me home
    I wish you heard the whispers I had told
    Your absence took me back to the place you saved me from
    I am at the same place from where once I was on the run
    It’s not your fault but you should have fastened your hold
    As the nights were too cold and it made my heart froze
    Now your warmth will break me in pieces
    Hear it this time don’t miss its hisses
    It will breathe the same tale
    All the broken edges have a similar graze
    No words could ever combine together
    To tell how much I missed you and your cuddles
    You should have kept your hold a little longer
    Now the emptiness have found in me its hollow shelter

    #Version 3 #last one with same phrase #sorry for this "miss you" on repeat ������

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    I hoped
    Waited aghast

    I ran
    Fell hard

    I screamed
    Pains aloud

    I met
    Familiar dark

    I found
    A shelter

    I placed
    Hollow heart


  • nocturnal_muse_ 1w

    Song by hariharan : Tu hi re
    In the piece "oh my moon greet me at my hearts horizon, else help me meet a land, how to live without you, without you, it's about you, you, you...." ( hell my translation)

    It's not good..but @dusky_dawn that's you know why i wrote this..n for whom ����
    I m pathetic n not romantic

    N like you..i can't write short��

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    Picking up my bag I left in a fury
    A hand on my wrist stopped my hurry
    I said I don't want to talk! I screamed
    He handed over a muffler. And yelled
    "Clean your mess and come back"

    Eyes still burning I stormed out
    Snowflakes slapped my face, I saw clouds making a teasing pout
    The muffler in my hand starred smiling back
    "He knows how to care even when I get mad"

    Allowing the wool to hug my neck
    Still not melting under its warm embrace
    Sitting on my office chair sipping on a latte
    Trying to gulp down the bad breath of yesterday
    The quote on the mug caught my attention
    "Your lips on me, make me sweeter, your smile makes my day better - from the f of your pun "
    "I smiled. It always made me smile."

    The meeting is over, boss's lusty stares still suffocate
    Back in the loo washed the stink of hate
    Fishing in the bag for a wiping paper
    My hand touched a familiar wrapper
    "Intense dark", the chocolate said aloud
    Remedy for my anguish was found
    I recalled, ordering this and many other things
    "For me. By him."

    Waiting for my cab,
    Regret shadowing me, brightening my dark faults
    Radio is on, and Hariharan sings a tune
    "Chand re..aja dil k zameen pe Tu..
    ake mujse mil ja Tu..ya fir aisa kar..dharti se milade mujko..tu hi re tu hi re..tere bina kaise jiyu"

    Who was at mistake
    Me? him? both?
    Who tried to solve
    Me? Him? None?
    And I recalled,
    even though when he was mad
    He told me to "come back"
    When he opened the door without me ringing a bell
    He hugged me and took me in, seeing me still in my shell
    I hugged him back. Without a say I know he smiled.
    Love for me has brown eyes

  • nocturnal_muse_ 1w

    I miss you (29/05/2019)
    How should I tell you?
    How should I start?
    Words are not enough to lay open what’s screaming deep in my heart
    It’s getting harder to tame
    With each of my empty breaths
    My eyes too look consumed
    They staring at the ajar door
    witnessing the sinking of its muse
    I am finding it tough!
    Now acting rough is also not enough!
    And finally, I am falling short of words
    There is nothing to explain how, why and where it hurts!
    Words are too few
    I wish my silence could tell you
    How much I miss you..
    The nights are too long and lonely
    A reminder of despair and old memories
    The dark dawns upon me its wrath
    Eerie silence mocking a calm embrace
    Yet a corner in me is waiting for you
    To pull me out of this mess
    Now the words too have turned less
    I wish my silence could tell you
    How much I miss you..

    #Version 2

    //P.s this was written long back.
    The lines had stuck in my head. "I wish my silence could tell you, how much I miss you".
    It was stuck. I tried to get them out in various forms. I tried I tried// bear with me..n sorry for giving you repetitation of feed//

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    Hey, where are your ears?
    Hey, why can't you hear!?
    I am screaming the same lines
    Come back, come back!

    Listen to me one more time!

    But wait! What and how?
    What will I say if you do?
    How should I tell you?
    How much I miss you?


    Hear me once. My silence is getting louder

  • nocturnal_muse_ 1w

    Your hard work. Your struggle
    When the fruit not given.
    You often get sour to those who get the blessings of your desires.
    Maybe they prayed a different form. And you were not aware just like they were not about you.
    It's ok.
    Karma heard.


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    An inch close to getting what you have been planning and dreaming the whole year.
    And then a gust of wind comes and takes it away and land it on a place to a person who never was aware of its existence.
    A Surprise to them
    a surprise to you.
    Was it fair enough? Karma you hear?


  • nocturnal_muse_ 1w

    And that's why I adore. The dark. It highlights, accepts all that's hidden .

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    It's dark here. But I can sense my skin my scent and my limbs. I never felt it before. The way I am feeling it now in these silent whispers.
    The dark helped me find my home. It helped me see my raw form.


  • nocturnal_muse_ 1w

    The Moon and her Sun (26/05/19)

    The softness of clouds, blushed by her cheeks
    As the unseen magic was waved by the cold breeze
    The blanket of starry night was yet again laid over
    Bright twinkles curtailing the empty, dark cover
    Their laughter was loud, a million stories they shout
    With her though;
    Amidst these babbling stars, loneliness was still hanging out
    Their shine was not enough to plug the voids
    The hollows and darks of the spaces were difficult to avoid
    It was known by all and flaunt by her flaws
    Fervently she waited for the dawn
    The glimpse of her long-distance love
    His warmth embraced the feathers to her dove
    She would stare at him ceaseless
    His rays burning her, rendering love-spots now countless
    She would try to move closer
    Distances between them needed a closure
    But the gravity of troubles was deeper than what she believed
    Pulled back by her roots each time she tried to move an inch
    They shared the same horizon sometime, each day
    He left at the dusk with stars and clouds for her to play
    All down the earth would look them up and sing songs
    All she wished for someone to tell him that she felt the nights to be long
    Though the nights were cooler, she still would do anything to burn a little long
    For she was the moon and he was the Sun,
    Together was the place, where their eternity belonged
    In the midnight her voice was muffled by the twinkles to a whisper
    “Words are too few, to tell how much I miss you”
    This was all that her heart knew to be true.

    #version one

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    “Words are too few, to tell how much I miss you”


  • nocturnal_muse_ 1w

    She is brutally honest.

    She is a writer.


    I saw her walking under stars with a book in hand and a cat to her side.

    P.s @theinsaneink I know I have not done justice. This is far from witty and I don't want to even start on calling it anything even close to creative.
    But I love your write-ups for all the bold and sarcastic attributes it has.
    N this is just for you n the boost u gave.
    I hope u don't hate me for writing silly.

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    Who is she?

    She heard it and let the cat do her walk.
    On her silent paws, she slid away from questions' wrath
    Closing her eyes, the pretence led others to believe she is oblivious
    But her keen remarks sometimes cheated her, exposing her tail that's curious
    Though it was hard to read her, try if you will!
    Don't blame me though if her verse deceives

    You might call her an open book
    Try to read her out aloud
    You will hunt a dictionary who holds her words as crown
    And Each dictionary you ask
    Will spell a different meaning of the same part

    Bits and pieces here and there
    She spattered herself in every town she went
    Try to make a whole, if you can
    One part of her will not lock to other
    The pieces of the puzzle will add to your wonder

    Solve her name, maybe that's the answer.
    Like the night she is dark, away and silent
    But there is a moon in her and the stars that bloom
    The chatter they do, outshining the dark, And there, hopes get a room
    You will feel that's it! She is the source
    Of all light and goodness that evolves.
    And you overlook her real address.
    The dark is where she resides
    But You see only what she don't hide

    Hunting for the hidden gifts
    You reach to her poetries
    You will see her smile and her pains
    To view her sarcasm though
    you need to see her face
    Illogical and spurious have got their slap
    Her eyes know to roll in the way, hands know to clap

    Her pit black eyes hold the ingredients to entice
    Don't yet get rolled away! Her eyes never could lie
    A piece of dark chocolate and see the glee it provides
    Getting her mad is tough and soothing her down an ache
    Don't try to roast her she knows well to bake
    And since now you read the recipe it's time you remake!
    You read her and you will feel
    You did.
    She makes you read
    What she wants you to feed

    So? You read her, is that what you think?
    You did of course. You are right
    She says. You just did.