im a 23 YO weirdo .. This is how i document my life experiences, my thoughts & my feelings.
Swiftie for life !
That reminiscent voice touching millions..The lyricist par excellence...The story teller like no one...This 13 year old discovered this magical voice in the perfect love story..The image of the girl singing about her remeo imbibed this fairy tale of love in him..10 years later..She's still his favorite get away for feeling things ...He somehow grew with her music and was inspired by her growth...He just wants to say Thank You for the music .for the motivation to embrace his weirdness..to inspire him.to write !©ajay_writes
Some nights are to sleep & then there are nights to just lay down gazing at the starsand getting lost in endless possibilities by wearing a bright smile !©ajay_writes
Caged in life of the party !
Ain't it weird...Free he was ...in those freezing moutains completely cut off from the rest of the world..The home he rents in the city with all the amenities..The life of the party as they would call it....Claustrophobic is he in that work environment...Constantly afraid of being criticised...Constantly doubting his professional abilities..Constantly whining about not liking it...Constantly feeling low and ill..Just for a change or an alternative he desperately waited..Lost is he somewhere still pondering over what's wrong !©ajay_writes
I still remember !
That rainy night I still remember....That dark room with just the moon light I still remember....That dull face of you I still remember...That drunk me hugging you I still remember..That me who felt like his whole world tumbled down I still remember...That me who cried on my flatmate's lap I still remember...With my hands wrapped around a pillow tight i suddenly went back to those days.. Yes I still remember !!! Yes I still believe in its beauty ..Yes I still believe in that love !©ajay_writes
To those failed trials !
To the people I've dated..To those tight hugs..To those kisses... I'm sorry..Maybe you might have been the right person but we met at the wrong time..Maybe it's the baggage from my past.. Maybe it was my anxiety or my insecurities..Maybe i was too clingy or maybe I was too horny..Or maybe I got too busy with work / studies...I'm sorry..I was a disappointment & I hurted you..Wish you all are in a great place right now..What happened had to happen..I might not have explained my situation ...But believe it or not..I had to do what I did for I was right in my own way...Just one expectation from everyone.. Please never hate me !. You all made a difference in my life & I can never thank you guys enough !..I still need love . still need someone to care.. Been feeling a bit lonely lately.. Maybe it's not the right time yet!!!©ajay_writes
Ripped was his t-shit by your sheer vigour...Those lips of yours with vibes of a lion released from its den..Your hands spanked him with all the might emanating from the lust...He moaned to the rhythm of your bites..The ripped pieces of his t-shirt on the floor didn't seem costly for the steamy kisses knew no cost...Lust it was..Pure lust ... Ported was he to this unknown dreamy land..©ajay_writes
Solo Trek !
In a land a 1000 kms away in those snow covered paths he walked.....he survived.. he lived...The hill completely cut off from the rest of the world..Just him & his pensive mind wandering freely in those unknown paths..Every mile he scaled felt so serene..so satisfying..so humanlike...Every footprint on the snow ... so clear..it felt like a new world ..a new life & a newly found freedom..At around 12000 feet he found his long lost solitude...He screamed, he jumped , he ran....Tears rolled down for he couldn't contain his happiness..The snow storm , the cold & numb hands & feet & every breath spewing fog.. it all took a back seat for his awestruck mind lost all of its senses to the sheer beauty of the heights he scaled ...The stars so dreamy, even the astrophile in him grew a 1000 years...Was it heaven ? Or was it all just a dreamy land ??Definitely it's the world where he felt he belonged..©ajay_writes
New year night !!!
The clock ticked a bit faster than usual that night...The skies and the city lights brought us to the chilly roof top to click all the perfect Silhouettes.. Excitement so high..Him so hot that I just wanted to cuddle every second..The new year approaching ..Him on top of me all cute in that couch..The music so "perfect"...Alarm all set to welcome the new year....The phone buzzing giving the signal...It's 12:00AM!!!He dancing and me grabbing him closer to kiss ...Waaah .The perfect start to this year !!!!...The dancer in him blasted out making me all envious of the seemingly perfect dance moves.. Maybe I was in awe or maybe he indeed is a great dancer..The night brought us to the comfy bed with my Alexa playing all the favorite Taylor Swift songs leaving us laying next to each other with arms all wrapped to the perfect night...Was it something toxic we never know.. maybe it's all the Taylor Swift magic which made us make out in sleep which just left us with the memory of the cuddles & kiss in the middle of the night..Am I not the luckiest guy to have such a start to this 2021 ?..©ajay_writes
Him & him !
The legs all tangled in an inseparable knot...His hands all wrapped round his waist..The warmth of the blanket draped coupled with yours all putting December's winter calls to shame.."Can't keep my hands to myself" playing in the background with its quite literal rendition inside the blanket..The dim red lights blowing the seductive energy in the air..In his soft caress of lips, the stress saw an escape route..M&Ms all envious of the sweetness of this him& him cuddles..His apathy bloomed as ecstacy & his empathy turned priority for his sanity..Quite lucky he is .. might there always be a him for him for his world shall never know a perennial solitude !©ajay_writes
The Corporate slave..
Where did he go? ..The guy one year back with that oozing zeal, the guy whose self confidence admired by many..The guy who aced all the interviews ...The guy whose eyes sparkled in pride of where he stood..Where did he go ?....Not even an year it took to lose it all...The dark spots under his eyes are as good as shredded paper....2 AMs have become the new 8PMs..Flow of criticism seemed unfazed amidst perennial slogging..Seems like he was bought by the corporate machine with zeros attached to his pay cheque..Hey.. What's does it mean to fall sick ? it's quite common right ?.. Get up big boy .. open your laptop .. Attend your meetings .. work for 15 hours ......Hail thee the life the world so enviously look upto.. The 23 year old who has it all sorted out as they say...His loss of self confidence , sanity , his personal life & countless others.. everything seemed so bleak to the world outside who envy...Oh ..The glorious life they say ..The Exceptional.experience they call.. ..What a Sham...!.©soulful_mess
The reward of suffering is experience. - Harry S Truman
Some people really need to sanitize their thoughts along with their hands©_sarah1_
Even when I realised I could not trust you.I still could not stop myself from loving you.Even when i realised you didn't deserve me.I still felt like i deserved you.Because i have already given so much of me to you and invested so much of energy and time in you.That it just didn't seem fair to have to walk away with nothing.