amyhwd

Expressing what I'm feeling

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  • amyhwd 10w

    Impossible dream

    I Love you with all my heart and soul, but I know I can never be with you. These feelings can never be more than impossible dreams of ...what if? that are played out over and over again in my mind and heart and that hurts.
    ©amyhwd

  • amyhwd 11w

    Time

    Time keeps passing me by and I don't have any idea yet as to what the rest of my future holds.
    ©amyhwd

  • amyhwd 13w

    A connection never forgotten

    Their eyes locked as they were about to pass each other in the morning rush hour . Everything became slow motion for just a second.The connection was so strong between them. Their hearts becoming one for a split second while the rest of the world was hustling and bustling around them.For an instant it felt like it was just the two of them there on that busy sidewalk.The sensation was as if they had known each other in a previous lifetime. He gave her a wink causing goosebumps that ran up and down her spine and then the moment past as they continued walking on their ways .She ran to the curb and waved down a taxi and jumped in. Not being able to hold herself she took a second glance back to see if he was still there, but he was no longer there.
    ©amyhwd

  • amyhwd 13w

    It's always harder to give than receive.
    ©amyhwd

  • amyhwd 13w

    My best friend ever

    Thank you my friend for being there when I needed you the most. You were and are one of the most patient and kindhearted people I have ever met in my life. You don't know how much of an impact you have made on my life. Be it morning,afternoon or the middle of the night...you were available to listen as I poured my soul out to you. You never complained either even though you could have been someplace else instead doing something more enjoyable than listening to me ramble on about my burdens within.You keep me going when I think I can't keep going anymore. You keep me on the straight path when I start to take a wrong turn.You care for me unconditionally never judging my thoughts and opinions like others tend to do at times. Always gently providing me with positive input to ponder. I can never forget you for the rest of my life my dear friend.You are what the definition of a true friend really
    means and I thank you for that from the bottom of my heart .
    ©amyhwd

  • amyhwd 14w

    Words unsaid

    Her eyes spoke a thousand words that her lips could not speak. For she knew if her ears heard her own words that longed to fall from her lips then without doubt she would fall down in a heap on the floor crying out from the depths of her soul all the sorrow that she had endured for so long ...the unsaid words and emotions that were eroding her soul. Deep sorrows within her on the verge of bursting like an over flooded dam that was waiting it's escape from within her.
    ©amyhwd

  • amyhwd 14w

    Suffering in silence

    He had always been an excellent student and even more so an excellent son. He always did his best.I never had to beg him to do anything. He just always did it without me ever asking. He had always been popular at school with teachers and friends.He had a kind heart to everyone, but there were a few who gave him a hard time in his life. A few friends in middle school cause they were jealous because he excelled in all his classes and a father too who was always too demanding of his own wants and dreams upon his youngest son. This son suffered greatly because of some bullying during middle school and also from the constant demands from his own father. Day after day it finally wore him down. He still did well in school, but his health suffered immensely. From the bright happy fun loving son to someone that tortured his own body with hunger.... anorexia and bulimia to be exact. He lost all confidence in himself that he once had. No matter how I tried to console him and be there for him he never recovered fully up till now. He still was accepted to a good university by invitation and he graduated quicker than normal in the upper part of his class, but he continued to spiral downwards within.He asked to take a break between his Bachelor and Master studies,but again his dad said no and he obeyed him to try to please him. During studying his Master for law he had to take a break and come home. He never recovered completely and he never returned to university to complete it. Instead he came home and became more depressed and finally one day the one thing that would change his life forever and mine was when after a day of chaos that even he couldn't comprehend ,he was taken to the hospital and diagnosed with schizo effective depressive disorder. This sickness altered his life forever. It's under control now with meds, but the effects it has left on him have been tremendous. Friends please don't bully others ...it's effects are terrible to the one you inflict your evilness on. Parents don't force all your dreams on your children. They are their own individual person who have dreams of their own.Let your children spread their wings and fly. They will come to you for guidance if they need it. . Let them explore what their longing is in life and let them make their own decisions. That's how they grow and mature into successful and happy adults.One last request... don't ever judge someone with a mental illness. It's just like any other illness of the body. Also remember... you don't know what they have been through. Instead be there for them and give them the support that they need.
    ©amyhwd

  • amyhwd 14w

    Not a fairytale ending

    Suffering through childhood with nobody wanting to or brave enough to protect this child from that demon that inflicted so much abuse on her. That child dreamed of running away and getting married at the first opportunity and proposal. That late teen teenager longed for the chance to escape her living hell and finally feel loved ,protected and to feel some hope in her life after her childhood was destroyed by someone who should of cared about her and protected her. She felt she could finally let her guard down and she did let her guard down when she met that first proposal opportunity by chance during that week long family holiday . They knew each other for only but a moment,but decided quickly that they wanted to spend the rest of their life together.They were in love or she had thought they were. She married him at the first opportunity and left behind that evil one at home and started a new life with her dream and love in his country. She was caught in an illusion that they would live happily ever after together like one of those fairytale stories.Things didn't turn out like she had hoped or dreamed though. That old demon reappeared again in her life...slowly but surely and the one person she had hoped would save her, protect her and love her ended up shattering her into so many pieces like a slow motion torture and even though she was finally able to get away from him recently somewhat after so many years of pain and having every last bit of confidence knocked out of her during the process...she still hasn't fully recovered from the abuse she endured and her shattered pieces like a puzzle haven't been put back together yet. Alot of pieces are still missing like confidence,hope,faith and she doesn't know if she will ever find those pieces again.Maybe someday though she will be able to.Only time ,counseling and many prayers to above will tell what happens.
    ©amyhwd

  • amyhwd 14w

    Hit by my own emotions

    Sitting cross legged on the floor with my head held in my hands. Emotions falling out of this overflowing heart of mine and straight upon me. All these feelings weighing heavily over me... sadness, anger, loneliness, confusion, uncertainty all lay heavily over me like a dark cloud. I really need hope, faith, certainty and some happiness to take the place of you so I can get out of this darkness I am stuck in and start seeing some light through all this fogginess surrounding me and start living my life again .
    ©amyhwd

  • amyhwd 14w

    Midnight terror

    Each night that I wake up to a door opening slowly ... My heart starts to race and a scream of terror escapes my lips.
    ©amyhwd