She was lying on her bed suffused with thoughts.. this used to be the cosiest place for her.. whatever happened, she used to come and lie on it, and the bed hugged her back. But today it irritated her, it forced her to think. The hopelessness and the empty brain that she once loved now annoyed the most. She was simply gazing up at the fan that took turns and turns so smoothly. Why couldn't life be so smooth?
She could hear her heartbeat. Why was it even beating? She hoped it suddenly stopped pumping blood. It would be so cool. Her book lay turned upside down on the page she had stopped reading on. She was amazed. Books always succeeded in changing her mood. But today even they had failed. It felt as if a lifelong companion had been lost. The waves of thoughts hit the shores of her mind. The waves were so salty that they were wearing off the cliffs. They came. She sent them back. Yet they came again. //Waves never stop.// She knew the high tide was on its way, and soon it will take over the shore, drowning her mind. Now the waves had also been joined with the rain of sorrow. The sky was weeping. Her mind was facing destruction. But outside, she was still as beautiful as ever. //Loss makes people beautiful it seems.// From outside though. Just because the inner beauty gets passed on outside, for there is no place left for beauty inside her mind now. . And yet I gaze at the fan, my mind drowned. In thoughts. Thoughts that seem poison. Thoughts that kill.