We weren't like a typical love story. Yet we were like, we were I don't know if out of habit or for that tremendous addiction to try us, to feel us, to touch us and to destroy all senses and heartbeats. We were like street animals, that after giving them a little attention, some food and lots of love, they no longer want to easily get away from you.
We weren't jealous for each other, there were not hundreds of messages in the chat, nor did we see each other every day. But for every call or audio that we sent to WhatsApp, the desire to see each other fell short among so many words that we said on a cell phone.
We weren't typical lovers, but the force of attraction that had between the two resembled the physical law of universal gravitation formulated and established by Newton, where two opposing masses will always have a common point where they will always match, our arms.
We were another, almost unique and unrepeatable full of tenderness and unbridled madness that always found us wanting not to finish the game that one day we had unintentionally started.
I don't know who of the two was more crazy, if she for looking at me or me for making her feel like it was the most perverse, sensual and sassy poetry that my whole being contemplated in her persona every time I ran naked through the dining room, kitchen and the bathroom.
We weren't like a typical love story. She was a dream and I was the dreamer. She was the magic and I was the magician. She was the moon orbiting my earth. She was the andromeda galaxy, slowly approaching my milky way. She was a little red riding hood and I was her fierce wolf lying to everyone that we could never be together.
We were more hugs, kisses and uncontrolled love. We were two quiet angels in the distance and two restless devils in the closeness. We were our own story ...
In this search for happiness, the ultimate place you reach is where you realize you've been running away from it ever since you started searching for it.
Happiness can't be described by the word that spells it, nor in the smile that makes you feel it. For once you write about happiness, you realize you can never surmise it's whereabouts.
It may be living hidden beneath the faded old carpet covering your floor and all you do is dust off its surface, hoping happiness has been waiting for you to cleanse the home you've always lived in. It may be counting on its last breaths with the fading ink on your old diary, within the pages of which you've kept pressed the only rose someone gifted you.
Do you want to know what it feels like to have happiness within you? Maybe you can try anytime, keep your hands on your chest and feel the thumping organ beneath your ribs, beating life into the person you call yourself, instead of talking about skipping a beat or two at times you think you're too happy.
Happiness can be anything, from a song that speaks to your heart without you knowing the lyrics of it, or a person who's been screaming his lungs out at a seminar urging you to love yourself not because he'd get paid for it but for you to feel your heart racing even when you hear his voice through the broken screen; happiness can be something you want to be, or something you think you can never be.
Happiness doesn't have a definition; even if you find one in a dictionary, it's only what the author felt about it himself. Your happiness is something only you can define and live.
If you've a voice, make sure you let it be heard. If you've a song you want to write, make sure you write it. If you've a pair of broken glasses, make sure to get yourself a new one. Noone gets to say what's for you to do, give that right to yourself. You can be a far better person than the one you look at in the mirror, for what lies beyond your happy smile, is the real you; whether that's happiness or your search for it, only you can make sure you see it clearly.
/Only you have eyes that sees the real you, so make sure you see yourself through./
P.s Something even I'm yet to understand more of. (Couldn't help scribbling even when not in the right mind) ~A small dedication to the one who taught me this 김 남준 #kimnamjoon