Today it's okay to burn and break. Today it's okay to dwell in the pain and regrets but tomorrow, I hope you'll find the ability to forgive yourself for every low. I hope you'll find peace with every chaos. I hope you'll have the ability to chase your dreams harder than ever. I hope you'll keep walking forward and never walk backwards. I hope you'll cease to chase the love that you will never find. I hope you'll know that you are enough and flaws are only human. I hope you'll see the beauty that lies inside of you and shape that gold broken heart into an unbreakable diamond. I hope you'll find ever lasting happiness within yourself. I hope someday you'll rest upon your sorrow, that day you will look back at today and laugh.
I have never been, and probably never will be one of those spirited girls you've been so used to seeing. The ones who're confident about their decisions. The ones who wear the latest trend and go to movies with friends and lie to their parents so that they can go on a mini vacation with their boyfriend. The girls who know precisely what lipstick to wear, which foundation to choose. I second guess my decisions on most days. Even before beginning to read a book... I think, again and again and again. I find myself struggling to choose the middle path, that'd help me put myself as a priority and also not hurt anyone unnecessarily. I don't know makeup. But I'm learning. Not because society expects me to. Simply because I like it. Some days when I don't even have to go anywhere, I get all dressed up and put on my favorite earrings, the nicest tint of pink in my collection of lipsticks... take a few selfies... and then go to sleep. I find it hard to lie... especially to people I love. So a secret mini vacation might not be possible. You probably wouldn't feel comfortable showing me off to your friends. I'm boring... that's how most people would define me. I know I wouldn't find their jokes funny. I don't know the latest celebrity gossip... or of cricket clubs and football leagues. There won't be any common interests and I'd end up either stifling myself or annoying them to death... with my measured presence. And trust me on this, I'd not let any sexist remark pass by. I'd either expect an apology or I'd leave. Making the situation awkward for you and your friends as well. So I understand your reluctance. I understand this hesitation. I know it's difficult to choose something that appears dull but glows on the inside... over things that glitter and catch attention, in the blink of an eye.
••• Here breadcrumbs means giving attention- enough for a lover to stay, not enough to let him ask you to be accountable of your actions. (Poor selfless love) You're treating him as an option as per your convenience. Rot!
A scream is one of the most honest emotional expression that exists. It isn't imposed. It isn't culturally valued. Hell it makes you come out as a villain and immoral and selfish. Why would anyone take on all that blame. But people do. People scream. People scream when whispers won't work. When no one listens to what they speak. People scream when the chaos within suffoctaes and struggles to be released. Screaming isn't unnecessary. Screaming isn't fancy. Screaming is sheer helplessness... a final call for help. A final blurting, purging... before someone falls back to silence. Next time someone screams... don't close your ears. Let it ring. Maybe it'll break something inside you too. Something you've been holding inside glass boxes since the inception of your being.
I had a dream yesterday A girl caged in constricting chaos She was judged on her color So she stopped facing the sun She was rejected by her love When she appeared before him for the first time One by one she gave up all that she loved because the one who meant the world to her taught her so. She tried every cream that she could. But her color remained the same. She feared visitors for being stared. She caged her inside and out She again fell in love And this time she feared facing her love For the rejection she once experienced, stopped her. She wants to be alone Not because she doesn't love others. She wants to love her dreams, her life but most of all her own self. All that keeps her smiling and moving is her strong hope to survive and prove the world She can chose what she want, Pursue what she dream And fall in love Because she is a humankind Not a racist, not a misogynist.
She strives to break free from the cage within To breathe the real air of freedom Not so far, not so near, Just a touch away.