Two times this morning I've been asked: How are you? I want to scream out loud : "I'm not fine" I want to break down in tears letting my pent up frustrations out I want to talk. Cry. Listen. Talk again. I want to get a hope of healing
I calculated the width of my smile and the posture of my well arranged teeth I spoke with exuding confidence you've probably never seen "I am fine, doing super great" I replied Even the words agree with me by rolling out perfectly from my lying tongue Ignoring the lump in my threat threatening to swallow those words back These words build a fallacy around my existence I am fine.
So its been over a year actually since I was diagnosed with otitis externa moving media actually. Got it treated. And I was fine afterwards except for the tinnitus (ear ringing). But early this year, it reoccurred, turns out. I got chronic otitis media. First time putting this through poetry. Lol. Lame right. Losing my hearing scares me the most but either ways, we move. We all have a story to share, and often times, we seek release through poetry.