Love (notes on my experience)
Some reasons why I love you and will always love you ❤️
The way you caught the snake in our backyard, bravely, with no hesitation to protect our little dogs and me. And most importantly, the kind way you drove to a vacant field to release it unharmed. Similarly, the way you trapped the mommy, daddy, and baby rat and drove into the wilderness and released them unharmed, and with some food to start their new lives together.
The way you look at our first born doggy as if she owns you (which she does). The way you spend money we don't have on a tiny tiny parrot so she will have all the toys, houses and foods and vitamins and vet care she needs. How you lay there patient ly letting her pull and tug your beard hairs as she preens you with adoration.
The way you help me when my body fails. Bring me ice packs or rub my head, back and neck in absolutely all the right places without me saying where.
How you let me stay home while you work to support us. This is huge and so selfless of you. The way you stayed with my Abuelita, in her kitchen that year the family was screaming and scaring her. How you held her hand and comforted her and then on top of that, you stood up for me and got me out of harm's way. No one had ever stood up for me before. I will never forget those loving gestures.
The way you drove me to all my doctor's appointments after I could no longer do it myself.
How you told me everything was going to be ok, and it was.
How you used to hold me through the night until your arm fell asleep and still you kept on holding me. How you hugged me and let me cry into your chest after my night terrors took my mind and wouldn't let go of it.
How you accepted my brokenness, even though you had no understanding of the how's or why's.
How you called me a rockstar each time I clumsily plunked out a 3 chord song on an out of tune guitar. How you then would faithfully tune my guitar because I refused, stubbornly, to learn. Maybe because I wanted that connection with you.
How you dance with my son, the rescue pigeon, to the radio and coo at him so he has joy in his day. Or how you tenderly, and carefully trim his beak when it overgrows. Talking to him so he isn't scared. Or how you worked so hard to build him his two giant houses so he could still fly without the hawk taking him.
How you used to run your warm fingers up and down my back to comfort and love me.
How you never ever leave without saying you love me. How I never need to worry that you might abandon me. How you tell my insecure mind that you aren't going anywhere, you are here to stay.
How you used to throw the ball for the puppy in the yard and watch her race to me and then back and forth. How you cared and loved my soulmate dog when we first started dating. How you still love him even though he is long passed. I never thought anyone else could love him as much as I did, but you did. How you lifted him up when he couldn't jump, snuggled him inside your sweatshirt when it was too cold in our rented room with no heat. How you woke early to lift him out the window so he could have his morning pee.
The way you love the animals I love has made me love you more and more each day.
The way you forgive me for getting angry sometimes. You forgive so easily. The way you have never screamed at me. You've never raised a hand to me, never once called me a cruel name or even cussed at me.
You take care of me when I can't care for myself and encourage my creative ideas.
You keep me surrounded with my animals because you know that is my happiness in this world.
You listen to me ramble about the jumping spiders I love and look at photos I take and compliment me. Even though I'm aware they all must look the same to you.
You are kind, gentle and loving.
You are so strong, smart and handsome. You are a puzzle solver, thinking outside the parameters set by others.
You are a creator.
You are a lovely person. I wish we had more time to have adventures in nature. A hike a sunset or stars.
You bought me a motorhome, my absolute dream. You worked so hard trying to fix it up. It's my bucket list. Without you I never would have been able to get it.
Thank you, for being yourself. Thank you for sharing parts of you with me.
I love and appreciate you sharing this life with me for these past 11 years. I could not have survived without your tender care. Thank you, with all the gratitude I have. I love you.
My partner in this world.