To see is to feel.
To feel is to see.
To share is to care.
To care is to share.
To hear is to fear.
To fear is to hear.
To have been used.
You are already fused.
I seem to be in my shackles.
As it is there are most of my tackles.
But I'll be damned if I only let you hear one side of a story.
You needn't have a worry.
I have dug myself out of worse.
I am as strong as a damn horse.
My husband, he looks at me and says I'm tough as nails.
I just laugh, as time tells all tales.
See, what y'all dont know is that through my writing, I heal.
It seems it's my way of disposing what I feel or don't want to feel.
You heard a bit of my writing, and you let yourself define me on your damn terms.
Close minded, and a misunderstanding on your own part.
I have demons, I have a life, as do you.
We both see how unfair life is.
You live with so much money, you have your big house.
And you have a house in Mexico, that's more than I have ever had in my lifetime.
And I am the fool.
I let myself be the fool.
If only things were different, and we actually knew who one another were.
Maybe we would know the cure.
As to the future, our family, you all are spoiled, had all handed to you with the golden spoon.
And I am just fighting for survival.
Must I be judged by you because I don't work, I don't have this, I don't own my own house.
I am only a woman, who learned to accept what is, pass no judgement, listen to anothers story, and feel as they do.
I learned that to be selfless.
I know that to be blessed, that's the way it goes.
I was chosen for this life, I believe that in a perfect world, as in yours.
I needed this lifetime, as it has shown me what needed to be.
So, in my next lifetime I will be accepted, by the foolish, by the damned, by the chosen ones.
I am the light, I am the one to show others their way when they fall from grace.
I let myself fall on my face.
I been put in my place.
I am looked down on by you, and others, and I know this.
But if I gave a shit, I wouldn't be who I am today.
I had 4 kids, I love each of them, no matter the brainwashing that has been instilled.
If it came down to it, I would die for any one of them, to save their life.
It's through them, I saw how the world was.
How cruel, how greedy, how fake and unreal many of you are.
I am me, I am a woman to speak my mind.
Without a voice you will never be heard.
So, I tell my story, I know it's not filled with glory.
I can't be as you are, I can be myself.
Whether acceptance is in my cards or not, I will be me.
This lifetime I have given so much of myself, and I would not have it any other way.
That's why I am here.
That's why I am blessed.
I wish you could understand.
It was all God's plan, I just did as directed.