The Heart of Being In Love With
Someone I Didn't Know
Someone handsome came one day i hardly even knew physically, came into my
Life out of the blue,
That I hardly even knew.
Who was this man?
This man was talked among
She told me, Ciara, Me and your aunts found you someone
Who could be your lover.
Who is this man?
my family told me, Ciara, we
found this man at a pizza
joint who is handsome.
Well, how do he look?
Mother told me, awe child,
he would be a good fine man
to have beautiful babies with
to come home to cook with.
Described this man to me please, is he light skin or dark skin?
Naw child, he is average and thin.
But what color is his skin?
Oh child, he is Mexican.
I want proof?
That day of wonder of
Meeting someone through my family that I will never forget.
Omar was his name,
Texting him all night in desperation was myself to blame,
I didn't know what the meaning of true love was,
I admit it, I was young.
Sitting in class lectures messaging Omar with my
Good mornings and evenings
made me felt better.
How could someone be so
In love with someone through a text message and not yet seen?
Each day and each moment, I kept asking the man of my dreams,
To meet me on a Saturday,
But he had to work around his schedule daily.
It seemed so long,
three months not waiting to hold on.
That feeling of meeting
the man I hardly even
knew was a kind of feeling
I was willing to surrender my all to this man than not to surrender my all to God.
Oooh that moment giving up
Everything that was my addiction,
that was no longer my convictions.
Intentionally deleting every
Pornographic videos I had on
My On Demand to meet this man.
I gave up my bisexual feelings
I really wanted to meet this man,
But I had to delete every single lesbian porn on my phone.
Repeating the words out loud,
NO MORE PORN, NO LESBIAN PORN, AND NO MORE MASTERBATION I DO EVERY NIGHT TO MOAN.
Oh I had to give it up, I had to
Give it all up for this man.
I was no longer bisexual anymore,
That moment I wanted to spend time with him more.
That day texting Omar to
I had my mind to undress.
Seeing him made me feel good,
Meeting the Mexican man the
first time was a blessing.
Observing his figure and and spikey hair,
Seeing him and watching him leave out the door with a handsome smile with no glare.
Texting him again to see if he made it at home,
But he responded back only to my last name instead of my first name that I thought was skeptical and wrong.
That moment I knew he wasn't gonna go further,
He never called or any day other.
I felt so torn and
Thought to why did I surrender my heart to this man that could find any other.
That was the day that desperation was not going to get me anywhere or with any other,
And I knew I could do better,
But I didn't do better for awhile.
I intentionally went straight back to my bisexual tendencies for women for a worth wild.
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