Were You to Depart...
I'm too honest of heart not to confess
An inadvertent selfishness were you to leave.
With fullness of time, I'd no choice but to profess
I'd find your need to part ways despairing to receive.
The affliction your vestige would carve
A caved abyss of desolation in my heart.
I'm certain an inordinate wave of sorrow would likely inundate mine
More than yours, were you to depart.
I would be inept at preventing myself from saying
That I'd be devastated at the space that would remain.
The inexorable sad words that would surface
I'd not be strong enough to contain.
This weakness within me would not sit well,
Please don't think this heaviness I could ignore.
As well as loss, I'd also feel guilty as hell,
Also regretful, for never just saying that it's you I've come to adore.
In a way beyond how I nervously do on every occasion
For my enmeshed emotions, and thus words, I'd apologise.
Though unlike my usual perpetual sea of sorries
The contrition in this sorry, you of all people, would certainly see in my eyes.
I'd feel to cruel for subjecting you - to me!
For my wanting unborn moments, unexplored sentiments and words unspoken.
Guilty and maudlin, I'd pry myself away to accept
That you'd be definitely gone, all possibility lost, our connection broken.
I can't assure you I'd ever rid mine remorse,
Or that oceans of your memory in my mind wouldn't forever swell.
But I would honour the pursuit of your true North, take comfort in having known you at all,
Usurp a place of zenith, a bittersweet smile, and impart a softly-spoken farewell...