It was about 2 am, my eye lids felt heavy, I kept my phone aside and tried to tuck myself in to the bed.
As I was about to fall asleep, a strange sound shook me up. Unable to understand if I heard it for real or in dreams , I look here and there and close my eyes again. The sound appears again, deeper this time, from the window.
“Stop it Sampy, let me sleep”, I call out my dog, only to find him sleeping next to me!
The eyelids feel lighter & suddenly I am wide awake. I hear the sound again, it draws me towards it, I gather courage & go up to the window, & as I move the curtains, I see a lady there. “Who are you?” I shout, frightened & scared .
She looks at me with teary eyes and says - “ I know you have forgotten me and that’s why I am here today to remind you of me !” She can’t stop crying as she says this.
“But, I don’t know you”, I murmur, sacred as hell.
“Of course you do ! You know me very well, better than anyone else”, she replies. She begins to tell me the tales of my childhood & younger days, and as she speaks, I feel connected to her. Then, suddenly, she wipes her tears, looks at me in anger and asks - “What have you become ? How could you fall prey to all this? Have you forgotten who you are & where you come from!” I am scared & speechless, I don’t know wat to reply. I try to look into her eyes, but somehow fail. She holds my hands & I feel an energy rushing through my body, I raise my eyes again and look at her. I now recognise her, I recognise her very well.
She is me, my younger self, from 10 years back, she is the one I used to be, before I got wired up into a toxic relationship & became a victim of domestic violence.
Tired & helpless, I gave up on my life, but now after coming face to face with what I used to be, I gather strength to fight against it.
As she stands up to leave, I promise I’ll never disappoint her again.
Today, six months later, I am a free woman, free from all toxicities. She does visit me again sometimes,but only to tell how proud she is, of me!