When you are depressed you do not feel like being with anybody. You either sleep way more than usual or you can hardly sleep at all. Similarly, your appetite is either nonexistent or increases dramatically. Your energy level goes way down and you have a feeling of hopelessness about life. As difficult as it may be it is important to get out of the house and get some help. You are not alone.
In a minute we were almost, like you sledged down the slope and couldn't stop until something hits You lean over the parapet and yell; If only I could fly, the sky wouldn't be so blue but some birds are born without feathers.
I was rapt, when I passed by your two storey building and heard you cry over the phone facing the mirror and I thought if only I could walk back briskly, I would be able to write it down for I know the more I'll write about grief, the more I'll know about you.
I lay on my bed and picture you dancing with a man I've never seen, he brushes your hair as I watch you slipping naked into bed like the distance unfurling in a broken twig your lips part as you want to speak Which is to say, I burn all night and you sleep.
The October will come with autumnal leaves and I'd remember you never remembered me In the evenings, I'd still follow you down the street Walking behind, but you'd never look back as you'd disappear behind the lamp post, and ask stranger something I couldn't hear.
For the creases of my palm would always be dark, and the curtains inside my eyes would always long for tears and that my lips won't speak the intrinsic quality of histories and that no stars are nestled in the darkest shades of my hairs and that my feet would always be on ground and that my fingers won't tap when I wait and that my heart would always beat no matter how much hurt run through my veins— know that I'm not the girl you'd look at and see forever. My voice is not the sweetest thing you'd hear and that my eyes are not through which you'd see the universe and my hands are not as soft as petals of flowers and my laugh is not music to anyone's ears—know that I'm not the girl a poet would look at and think about writing a poem.
For I'll crash the cars over your expectations every night and that some days I'd kiss away your flaws and would ask the most scary questions in the middle of night and that violence and crime excites me as much as talking about hope and dreams does to you and that I recognize the worth of people even before they leave and that I'd stay at a place just a little longer to watch the hue of sky getting lost somewhere far away and just to hear the wind rustling through leaves - know that my love, I'm everything fragile and every warning people would ignore. I'm someone who write her own symphonies and someone who'd cross your mind once in a blue moon for I don't take much space in anyone's mind and that someone who creates art not to sell but to keep, someone who's sadder than the saddest of days and saddest of dreams - know that I can be anything and everything but not someone you'd take home, I'm not the girl you'd fall in love with.
That day, the adamant me surmised, Mahogany was the getaway, I yearned for, No, it didn't provide ayurvedic cure to my camouflaging dogmas, Neither to my aching voodoo doll, it had already burst off the agony. Didn't lend solutions to Math problems
Yet, an Oracle, that sprinkled life in this dead and delphic conscience, The bed of shed emerald leaves, loaned some sleep to swollen eyes, bereft of sweet lullabies, Dendritic, umber roots, reach out to my soul, Bringin' to surface the stifled identity, Holding it intact, an adhesive to the pieces.
Swingin' on branches, never cracked When I held 'em, Taught me how grief is To be dealt, how leaves fall each Autumn, And emerald blooms again, every spring. How it firms its bough against the zephyr's Punches, bargains with Sun's heat. Few people are supposed to leave and Let gone, like several twigs that fall off it.
Today, there I stood, watched my comrade Bleed, incessant pain, I felt, My cicatrix was fresh again, black-blue, It was cut, to fulfill man's oozing greed, It's fallen petals, reminiscence of our bond, Like Naphthelene balls, spread its aroma and Vaporized away, fell on knees to the man's Avarice, after surmounting the sun and wind. _________________________________________________ Picture from Pinterest @despair@sereiin@seyfert@soulfulstirrings@jeelpatel#ceesreposts @_hessa_@__aurora__@lily_love
Summoned under all the tackling chaos of aliveness. I find myself amidst a land of retaining. Where lies a river that withers wallowing. The lucid water scatter drops of satisfaction all over. Oblivion beams of grief volatile the birms. Each night, the river croon to the forgiving moon. Brisk halo of validation allow shallow passage of vain. In the morning, the river strangle for a new aspiration. Clenched weeps of hopelessness recite a tale of reincarnation. Away from the fable land, I sit and mourn. Resembling the same dried cries shattered by the river. Chanting a name, sighting for empathy alike the mystical moon.
I've always loved the moon, the giant white pearl shining bright amongst millions of stars, but i think moon is just like any innocent human soul which is broken, but still shining, smiling like everything's okay unlike the earth it has no atmosphere and let's everyone visit but is also vulnerable to meteroids, solar storms just like how a soul on earth who trusts everyone and is vulnerable to people who use them the craters it has are it's scars but those scars doesn't let it's beauty fade away, people still admire the moon regardless just like that soul with scars, broken but still beautiful moon has phases, on some days it doesn't appears in the night sky, and then slowly from crescent to full it gets back and like this a soul when completely broken down, isolates itself, alone, but slowly heals and get back again to this world there's a dark side to the moon it doesn't shows us, no one has been there and so has the soul, the dark side keeping all the secrets from the world
This writing is inspired by the song I heard earlier today : "Secret Love Songs" by Little Mix ft Jason Derulo.
While thinking, "Are we all really allowed to give our love to anyone we want?" Since, forbidden love is really an issue, in all countries, religions, societies and families. Social or religious restrictions, outdated ideas, someone is already in a committed relationship, the age difference is inappropriate, and or for some other reason the relationship would be frowned upon or 'forbidden' It’s funny why these even exists??? And many people's problems are made worse by the stigma and discrimination they experience - from society, families, friends and surroundings, since being part of a group still helps people feel safe and protected.
So, Is it really destiny to blame???
Misfit of Society
I was back on a trip down memory lane, Where silence was a stranger, Where the valleys were uncharted by emptiness, As We parted to single cells. We rose on buoyant tears, amoeba-light, to breathe new atmospheres and yet we sink. Somewhere, some place Defying gravity A beautiful contradiction in our unstable reality. "I know, everything will be alright!" it's just another comforting white lie. Since, I believe that we both can see that there is no foreseeable we. Yet, I cannot help but continue on to wonder why such a beautiful experience is so heavily shamed upon by society? The thing I want cannot be wanted in this world Because it is way too messed up [ perhaps even for me to dare to dream, at all. ] The night is full of stars we cannot grasp, though the world is ours, however isolation and fear fills the space. Dearest, impossible love of mine. Even though We cannot photosynthesize in the sun, I shall love in darkness. Underneath the soil, where we are tangled together holding hands quietly nourishing each other, till we come at last to understand: "man’s spineless heart is alien to any land." And no matter the winds shove, However strong they might, they will only sway me to sleep, for I am firmly rooted, deep within you, Inspite of the fact that, I could never grow a flower..... . . . Do you all think, I bury the darkness wrong? Nonetheless, I have learned that I was made for more than just unraveling...
I want to scream until my lungs give up And I stop this feeling of being choked every second Do you even exist ? How would I know? We never met, never talked Or did we? Did I just miss you while looking for you? How could I even pass you without feeling anything?
I am afraid here In this unwanted sight , Unknown to everyone I am afraid that everything is delusional I am afraid that you don't exist but I am even more afraid of your presence near me unknown to myself.
My hallucinations are taking grip of my breaths and Slowly I feel like losing control Letting go of an anchor to which my life has been holding on to
Can you assure me you are here, there , anywhere ..? Far , close to my sight ? Your mere existence will cure these unwanted heartaches Why does it even hurt Anyway?
Last evening... I was on the terrace in twilight hour holding a soulful tea that I take regularly. Moths & fireflies were busy in roaming. The breeze indulged this stupid mind to gaze the evening sky. After gazing hours ,I found the supernova. Do you know who was that ?? She was my Mom. Eyes filled with silence & My solitude evaporated like removal of the metaphoric dews with the approach of horizon.