herpuresoul

Be your own Hero

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  • herpuresoul 2h

    Do we begin to resent those (who aren't narcissist) but resemble our narcissist parents or partners?
    ©herpuresoul

  • herpuresoul 2d

    The male figures in my life are monsters, so I don't know the good people who have a heart. My dad's a narcissist and I don't know how men are otherwise.
    ©herpuresoul

  • herpuresoul 3d

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  • herpuresoul 3d

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  • herpuresoul 3d

    Today in Urus... Read caption
    ©herpuresoul

  • herpuresoul 3d

    Today, we went to an urus (festival which includes rides and eatables and also shopping items), there I realized one thing. I realized why I doubt myself, why I have low self confidence, why do I feel inferior to others, why am I never interested in buying jewelry and girl items, etc...these are things my mom often used to blame me for. She used to tell me why aren't you interested in buying jewelry, when I was your age, I used to love jewelry, clips, Bangles etc... Today in that urus, I spotted a necklace, which I instantly loved, I was asking the shopkeeper for the cost, that time my dad came from behind and was like, “leave it. It's a waste. She'll not even wear it' ” he told my mom. And at time it hit me, why I was who I was.

    Why I'm unable to make decisions. Why I'm not confident in my own decisions. This was why.

    The constant abuse from my dad.

    I'm a medical student and my needs were a watch, a sling bag, scarf..and everytime I went anywhere, he was following me. He saw that I was buying a watch, and then when I went to buy sling bag, he called me to come to the place where I was buying the watch. Since my cousin sister was also with me, she told, let's buy the sling bag and then go. So, I waited, he again called. He really didn't care about my other siblings or what they were buying, he was only concerned about what I was buying. I think I'm the scapegoat in the family.

    At each and everyone I bought, he had to add his criticism to it. And by the way, I have never ever in my entire life bought anything which I like. Meeting my basic needs was like asking for a favor. So I never thought about buying something that I like or love because it never mattered.
    ©herpuresoul

  • herpuresoul 3d

    May Allah help all those suffering from narcissistic abuse
    ©herpuresoul

  • herpuresoul 3d

    It's hard to live with a narcissist
    ©herpuresoul

  • herpuresoul 4d

    Children of narcissists don't live in homes, they live in warzones.
    ©herpuresoul

  • herpuresoul 5d

    Standing up for myself. It's really really really tough for a narcissist abuse survivor. But I will work on it. With persistence work and courage, I will do it.
    ©herpuresoul