Thank you so much guys. ♡ I tried reaching your level, but ik I'm no where near. (You can skip if you want, I just wanted to give credit where it's due ;)
I know you said love is neither right nor wrong, love is love. But sometimes love makes you do things, things that are wrong and no matter how much you try, they can't be justified.
I still remember the day he promised me forever, but I did not know then, that forever was a journey that would end at your feet, and start anew, leaving me behind. He still says he loves me, but he can't look in my eyes, for I know there's some guilt inside. But that isn't enough to ease my pain, is it?
I blamed you, both of you, but I blamed myself the most, for it made me question myself everyday. Where did I go wrong? It haunts my every single nightmare, where you both mock my despair. I tried being strong, but I broke down again when I heard you humming "our" song, and I wondered then, "Can love be shared?" I tried erasing your scent from his shirt, but what about the one that resides in his heart, how can I erase something that reeks of eternity.
Tell me, does your voice calm him? Cause mine is being choked by shadows unknown. Does he let you sleep on the right side of the bed, now that he loves you? Do you make him lilac paper planes the way I used to? Do you write him love songs too? Do you both laugh at the same lame joke I shared with him on a silly night? Does your song lull him to sleep too? Tell me, when he shares his guilt with you, does he tell you about my sorrow too?
When he smiles at me, all I can see is your reflection in his eyes, that screams in agony to be freed. When he kisses me, all I can taste is the chocolate tart, the one I remember being so much adored at your house warming party. In every part of him, resides an atom of yours and I cannot unsee anymore.
He seems too lost in his world that's torn between guilt and love, that he doesn't even notice how I'm fading away; slowly but in misery, into nothingness. He doesn't seem to notice that I no longer wear the emerald chain he gifted me, for now I know, how easily stones can be replaced by diamonds. He doesn't seem to notice that the same smile he created is getting destroyed by his very being. He doesn't notice and I try to be ignorant, for ignorance is a bliss right? But sometimes it's a curse that annihilates each and every single one of your dreams. Tell me how should I feel?
My hate is replaced by indifference, they say I'm healing, but numbness is still a feeling.
You both found love in each other, but in the process, you destroyed an innocent soul, one that is scarred for life and won't ever feel enough.