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  • huntydaniels 2w

    I could trust myself
    to plunge and take the fall lest I smash my head bloodied 'gainst the rocks laid out
    at the last second
    my innards flowing in queer circles right near the water's surface
    eyes bulbous and severed from their ruts
    these vultures sat collecting blood the stream
    I float in could end soon enough
    but I know myself I know what's up
    I know I should just trust my gut
    I know I've squeezed the right doors shut
    Should've just trusted my gut
    I know as much that I shouldn't ride the cusp
    A grasp on edges designed to rust

  • huntydaniels 2w

    who's in my corner?
    who's there at the end of the night
    who blurs my shadow
    who wraps me up
    unfolds me
    who collects the pile of me in the bed
    of roses in the garden
    and scatters me among the underbrush?
    who does it because they have to
    who does it
    because they wouldn't want it any other way

  • huntydaniels 4w

    I've seen it now
    The spark begins
    How these colors burn
    Your spirit moves in turn
    Churning
    Beneath the skin
    I'll only look
    Through this digital crutch
    For I'm scared you'll
    Burn me to the touch

  • huntydaniels 4w

    I've seen it many times
    Trickled with sin
    Laced within that childish grin
    Even so
    Much to my chagrin
    That these fingers can never trace the rim
    Of you
    It matters not the color possessed
    Light blue
    The shapes
    The flaws
    The faults
    Ensued

  • huntydaniels 5w

    Im gonna rub my eyes
    Like a child resigned to sigh
    Awoke late in the night
    And found the reservoir dried
    Bereft of tears to cry
    In the beauty of lost signs
    These tired eyes seem to find
    In any point or space in time
    A vision of love
    That remains in sight
    Wandering
    In the corner of my mind
    Who decided on me
    A certain line
    That I'm for me
    That I am mine

  • huntydaniels 6w

    Ive always thought of queerness
    When you think of biology and determinism and screens and pixels and abstract qualities of social standing exist as theoretical concepts as a
    buzz word that enable honey and baking
    the way that heat can tar out flavours
    and I keep grinding my teeth
    hoping for a synapse
    to remind me the way smoke tastes
    bitter and smoky
    a taste unfamiliar
    these tastes exist all their own
    lingering from a bakery's air
    sordid still that sweets
    lingering in remorse
    a rabbit-hearted girl
    scared of her shadow

  • huntydaniels 7w

    and I hate that I can't find a way to remember
    in such a way that doesn't invoke
    those feelings I had that day at 5:30 a.m.
    when my tears filled my jacket to soak
    and it fills me with a primal rage that this page
    a marked history
    chronicles what made me feel crazy
    the way people know this and still talk to him
    my vision's gone hazy
    I wish I could faint
    and sleep until I forgot
    time goes by and I
    can't control my mind

  • huntydaniels 7w

    I cried that one night I haven't cried for years
    of course I cried when my grandpa died
    resolved to nick my heart with shears
    when I was a child resigned to find a corner and mope
    but this was crying that fucking hurt
    came from my chest
    sobbing
    howling like a kicked dog yearning to breathe deeply and count to ten
    trying to get my voice back
    the way it was a gloat
    the way that shame scratched my throat

  • huntydaniels 7w

    my counsellor told me to write down every bad thing that ever happened
    not as a way to add insult to injury
    make myself deliberately sad
    but rather to reflect on the fact that there was mostly just bad
    things that continued and actually never ceased
    the numerous times my thoughts sought released

  • huntydaniels 9w

    it is the worst when gazes lock/
    an immutable silence lives in that space/
    and all movement halts/
    I wish I could hear myself think/
    when that red thread fastens to me/
    a gaze/
    the way it is to be seen/
    the way you want to talk to me/
    with every other part but your mouth/
    worry painted your face/
    and your sight sought (seeks) forgiveness/
    how you knock me down with the palm of your eye