I leave, before people could leave me because leaving hurts more than losing. I can't love properly. So I've stopped trying because everytime I try, I fail and I end up hating myself even more. I can't explain. So I've stopped explaining myself because every time I try, the things become more intricate than before and I spend many of my nights thinking about them. I get attached too easily. So I've stop letting people to come closer because it hurts like hell when they leave without any reason. I chose to be obscured. So that no one can understand me because everyone judges you no matter what you are going through they don't even care.
And darling if you are still thinking that you know me so lemme correct you, "YOU DON'T...... " You don't even know a bit about me.
Something are just not meant to be together, just like that, Some stories are supposed to be left incomplete . So as ours,
but I had never thought that our story will end like this, neither I want our story to be in the book that no one reads. I only wished that our story to be made up of many
unexpected surprises adventurous road trips( I remember your love for travelling)and full of tragedy and love that brings tears to one's eye but those tears are of joy.
Unfortunately we can’t do anything. May be we are not meant for each other so destiny separate us but I don’t understand one thing why has destiny allowed us to meet if there’s no way for us to be together?
I looked at our old photographs together, and I remembered,
When we both walk hand in hand at night and suddenly when you put one of your hand on my shoulders in insecurities by seeing others to pretend I’m yours,
I remember that moment cuzz it was very difficult for me to hide that smile from you, which came automatically by seeing your cute wiggles, but but as you know am too good at hiding my feelings and you know what when you put your hand on my shoulders at that time I felt more safer.
I looked down at my hands , and I remembered,
How you had hold them in the late winter night , trying to keep them warm . I remember how your hands always felt warmer then mine and the way you used to confess your love for me with a smile.
When I saw our old conversations I remember
How I used to sleep between our those late night conversation and next day opens up my eyes with a good morning text from you. I remember that blushing face of mine after seeing your texts.
You remember when you used to say that “you are afraid of losing me” and with a smile in my face “I used to say that whoever is meant for you will never go away from you”. And and you know what is the reason behind that smile-“your unconditional love”. Your this much of love never allow to come the thought of separation in my mind, but see how destiny plays with both of us.
So ofc i know there’s no point in writing this, but can I tell you something? Well thats the point. I thought I’ll never tell and you’ll never know,so here we go, just dont hate me for this, i loved you,i really did, you were the first guy my heart ever loved, the first guy i fell in love with Well i really did like you, even if we were nothing, to me you were everything well atleast that time. You didnt even do anything to make my heart love you, cause it just did, it happened and i know you dont know any of this and this might be so confusing.
But just know that even if it was for a matter of time, you meant alot to me, and the thing, well the only thing that hurted me about you was that when she said shit to me, you never stood up and maybe thats where and when i fell out of love cause i really wanted you to say something.
but maybe you dont get what you want, Not always.
You will forever have a part of my heart. You’re like a song I’ll forever have on replay, always favourite.
I loved you, i love you and I’ll always love you even after everything,always. You made me happy, my heart happy and I’ll never regret any of you, or our memories cause at one point you were exactly what i wanted and needed. Even if we stop talking I’ll always be here, im just a text away. You know my stupid heart just doesnt know how to stop. I really wanted me and you to be something but ofcourse we were nothing but just know that wherever you are be happy, thats it, thats all that matters to to me, you to be happy, also i love the way you smile.
Thank you for everything, for making me smile, for making me laugh, for every lil thing, thankyou❤️ so thats it, my lil secret that you deserved to know. -Gelukzoeker
I wrote this on 14th January 2019, One-sided love really hurts, doesn’t it? Been 2 years and I never thought I’ll move on, but i did and thats the best thing i could ever do to myself, for myself. ❤️
But for whom they are doing this? For corrupt minds, playing dirty politics Or the ones under their securities Raising questions on their salaries Or for those who enjoying at home And shouting for wars, Does they even know what it means? Evils who lost their morals and ethics Aren't they worse than those jihadis? Are they worth protection behind lines?
It’s only words they say But words are all we have at the end of the day To think a thought feel a feeling To have you understand what one is meaning It may not be much but it can cut So deep within your gut Warmth and desire Of love and fire Words are there to also inspire It is only ink to paper But does incite Emotions enough to ignite War and famine Hate and lament It may only be words but words aren’t to be spurned For it has the power to heal or burn. @atticoftheheart
Dear broken heart, why can't you fix me? And dear broken heart, are you still with me? And when I lay my head down and Think of the things that I'll never do, Dear broken heart, know I'm thinking of you. Dear restless past, I remembered you And the way you make things wrong. Do you want my tears to fall? So I'm standing all alone, All by myself, cold to the bone. Do you still want me there, just to take the fall? Dear broken heart, will you want me after all? Dear desperate soul, are you still searching for the one? The one who made me what I am, The one who broke this heart and made me who I am, Ripped from his hands. And dear broken heart, this letter is for you. I hope you get it in time. And please dear broken heart, promise me you won't cry, cry ,cry. Please don't cry for me.