a sad person who laugh brightly

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  • kaolyne 16w


    You called me Liar
    The biggest liar on earth you say
    You called me pretender
    The best pretender on earth you say
    You called me scammer
    The greatest scammer on earth you say

    You almost make me believe that I am.

    That old granny saved me
    "You are a good person, thank you so much"

    Just because you wanted me to feel unworthy
    Doesn't mean I have to
    I love you
    But I love myself more.

  • kaolyne 16w


    Yes I am
    I stay longer than I should
    I cry longer than I should
    I love longer than I should
    And it's plain stupidity.
    I hate me
    I wish I could say,
    But truth to be told.
    I am proud of me.
    I am not hating
    I am not resenting
    I am just trying
    To be the best stupid version of me
    Love are meant to be given free
    Am I not right?

  • kaolyne 16w


    I lose hope on love
    Like a child lost in the desert lose hope for water
    And there is nothing I can do about it
    There is nothing we can do about it
    Can we?

  • kaolyne 17w

    Haven't I told you before
    " I am afraid to be in relationship"
    You said, you understand
    That "we are in this together"
    But now, you say this relationship is all about me
    You were tired
    You fed up with my assumption and accusations
    You tired of being the only one giving efforts
    You said you lose feelings towards me
    And you say, it's all my fault.

    Yes , it's all my fault
    For not being able to make you understand
    My language of love.

    I wish you understand how afraid I were,
    But I accept you anyway
    I wish you understand how they lied and used me
    Maybe you won't be that mean to me
    I wish you see the stars in my eyes every time I look at you
    I wish you see the smile I gave every time I am with you
    I wish you heard my heart saying grace for having you every time
    I wish you see how exhausted I am dealing with my demon but I'm trying anyway.
    And maybe you won't blame me that much anymore

  • kaolyne 17w

    You say I am liar
    For saying I love you

    You say I'm a pretender
    I never even love you for real, right

    You say I am a scammer
    Wait, what? This word are too modern
    But okay,
    For staying when you asked me to leave.

    Thank you, I gave up on You

  • kaolyne 17w

    Remember me

    As the day gets darker
    The mind wander
    Floating in this small space
    Zooming itself out to my eyes

    "God, please help me, I can't stand this anymore"

    Yes, I will remember you.
    I will remember those tears
    How it's too tight inside your chest you can't breath
    I will remember you.
    I will remember those sobs, those unheard cry
    Because you don't want anyone to hear
    I wil remember you.
    How you wet your pillow every night
    And I will remember you.
    How it's must be so hard waking up the other day
    But you did.

    I remember you. A strong soft hearted person who refuse to give up tho life is not so kind.
    I'm proud of you.

  • kaolyne 17w

    I wish I could freeze this moment

    This shame and sadness
    This rejection
    Just so I won't make the same mistake,