Life is a gift but it can be a curse for those who don't know how to live it. Present is vital. Growth is important and we must never skip it in order to reach a particular age, so that we can fit among a particular group of people who just don't change. Because at night when we go alone to our beds, we can't help but feel we don't fit in this body.
I am so sorry! I didn't mean to hate you. You don't have an altogether 'angry-face' and your expressions are not always harsh. You have a sweet face and an innocent one. You're equally sweet and innocent on the inside as well. And even though it's hard to see it, for someone who is as impatient as me, I assure you I see it.
I hope I didn't make a mess. I hope my aversion towards you or everything else in general wasn't too visible to make you feel sick. But I do know you're good at taking hints even when I try not to give any. But I wish tomorrow when we both wake up it will be okay again. Normal again. Usually I make a blunder of things, so I hope this time the damage was only 3 on a scale of 1 to 10.
I can't help hating people for no reason I have to agree or it will haunt me. Once you agree with something you can move on from that and focus on other things that haunt you. But right now as my mind is clear of all the hauntings, I can see how different it makes me. It's almost like I like me. A person worth some ounce of love.
Most of the time I don't feel I deserve to be loved because of this entity that seems to posses me. I cannot declare this entity as foreign since it has always been there with me. Even though I feel it as something different it is a part of me and always going to be. So I've finally come to an understanding with it. I don't hope anymore to free myself from it because this kind of hope breeds 'eternal misery'.
I have come to take responsibility of some of my behaviours, if not my moods and feelings because I can't control what I feel and at times I give into them. I am a human being! So I forgive me. I forgive myself regularly these days. I am making it a habbit. And we know, forgiving is caring. Caring is loving. I am getting better at loving myself. And when I love myself I can't help loving others as well.
So I am practically trying to tame this 'entity' like it had tamed me all my years.
This is not the answer to throw yourself at every random person to give yourself the satisfaction that you're not alone. It would only make me more empty than I feel now because the life I've created on my own, comprises of things I desire the most. But to fill up only a fragment of my life in exchange for all the innumerable treasures cannot be the answer.
A while ago I'd been there doing just that, what people do to convince themselves that their half-hearted joys are nothing but a light that occupies every nook and cranny of a room. But I cannot do that anymore. I want the light that burns the brightest of all in its true form only. It can waver at times, it's acceptable but whilst it burns it must savagely. I cannot pretend. It's even worse than living a half-empty life and calling it as it is because here you can weep in the sorrow of it. It lightens your heart. Whatever the intensity you thrive in it gaily. It is a much better feeling. . . @writersnetwork#pod
Maybe you did love them when you first said you do. But eventually you changed, you grew and it's only normal to. Your idea of love transformed too, only the form of expression didn't flicker. "I love you" doesn't define how you love a person, it just says you do.
You still love them but may be more as a friend than a lover. But you're so used to of how you should act around them that you don't see a difference. If there is a foreign feeling or a shift in your attitude then you don't notice it at the moment because your brain takes time to process and then for it to travel to your outer senses is a whole another view.
Sometimes someone new may come along, with whom you develop an instant connection and you get nothing but confused. But the truth is things are not as mysterious and unpredictable as they seem. That idea was probably there in your head for quite sometime. Only a random event has helped you bring it to the surface. . . @writersnetwork#pod
I remember how i used to feel the damp earth underneath my feet. Water gushing out of pipes to acquire its every crevice. I swear its sweet tincture in the air still lingers. The deep brown colour of the quenched mud still visible. And in its wake sprouting of all the treasures- lush green strings of coriander leaves and red pearls of chilli peppers bursting forth with so much joy only a true gardener could decipher! The fresh scent of ripened guavas and a very distinct odour of its leaves and how they mixed and made a smell more heavenly. Oh! i had loved growing up around them and now i wonder why no other cologne would suit me.
What's wrong in forgiving someone even if all they did was tear you apart? It wouldn't make a difference to them anyway. They'll never guess how broken you were. If they did they wouldn't have hurt you in the first place or at least come up with a sincere apology. When you forgive you do it for yourself. You'll have one less burden to carry. Holding a grudge is tiring. Something lovely could've occupied that space and made you happy instead of all the rage you were storing. Plus there's a pride in it. You rise above them. You become a bigger man. Revenge is satisfying but the feeling is temporary. It would still hurt just the same. But the next time the desire to avenge would be stronger than ever. I've seen it. One man becoming another man's enemy. It will seem like you're winning but it will be your downfall.
I am so scared that everything I've built would come crashing down in seconds. This facade that I've put would reveal its true form. Like a ticking bomb I will explode. It's a matter of when. Better now than later because I can't deal with this agony. But right now I feel numb. There is no sensation of pain. Tears won't come. Just a small realisation of its existence but hidden. There's no peace to be found. I have no where to go. Who should I seek at a time like this when i am alone and unreliable. Usually I have me, but lately it feels like i have lost myself. I doesn't surprise me though. I had it coming.
If you're anything like me (and God help us if you are! ), then chances are that you keep a rather lengthy list of favorite words somewhere (mine's in my memo app) and you add to it often. My list is primarily comprised of words that work well in poetry, but I also have a few zany zingers in there that I find rather interesting or amusing. I'll be providing those for today's challenge.
OFFICIAL RULES: Write a piece of no more than 20 lines using one or more of the words provided below in the 'wacky word' list. Submissions must be written in English please, and only one submission per participant. Please allow up to several days for me to see your submission.
WACKY WORD LIST: Use one or more of the following words in your piece. Make sure that you understand the word's meaning and how it functions in a sentence.
Haberdashery: Noun. An old fashioned term for a store that sells men's clothing.
Davenport: Noun. A somewhat outdated term for a couch or a sofa.
Conundrum: A confusing problem of question.
Vicissitude: Noun. An unfortunate change in circumstances or fortune.
Cacophony: Noun. A harsh, unpleasant mixture of sounds.
Jejune: Naive and simplistic, uninteresting.
Picayune: Adjective. Trivial, unimportant, or worthless.
Ennui: Noun. A feeling of listlessness, boredom, or dissatisfaction.
Curmudgeon: Noun. An ill tempered grouchy old grump. We all know at least one of these stinkers.
Lollygag: Verb. Lacking enthusiasm and determination.
Rigmarole: Noun. A complicated and lengthy procedure, or a pointless and rambling banter.
Ballyhoo: Noun. A bunch of ridiculous, pointless fuss about nothing.
Snickersnee: Noun. A large knife.
Gregarious: An adjective that refers to a person who is very sociable and fond of company.
ABSOLUTELY NO: ▪Plagiarism ▪Nude or otherwise inappropriate images ▪Harsh, foul, vile, or inappropriate language.
Here on my skin Your kisses felt Beyond the words That touched my heart * In night of days And day's of night Vibrations flow As sparrows fly Their nest to find * We did the same Here in your arm's A gift of light Two souls Ignite * We snuggle close Not loosing sight The warmth of truth Love resides within Its strength At sunrise and Sunset * That lingers upon Eyes gazing glow Gripping tight The here and now Yesterday's Passed on * We live we die A lover's song Together we Belong
There was a time when I was completely in love with black. Nothing around, just stark darkness. It comforted me. Cos I feared the outside world. Long hours in black with nothingness. Eyes wide open staring at nothing. I use to feel my heart beats, pounding and not cos of fear but cos of me being alone. Sometimes I used to feel as if someone touched me. But that was ok. I was not afraid . Black can at the most cover you from all around. At that time I was able to feel only......my heartbeat, tears flowing down my cheeks and my breath. Guess I got used to that. Then one day, as I was lying in my black comfort zone, I saw a Firefly moving around. I was surprised as I had not seen one since ages. My curiosity arose. So I started following it. I was able to hold it in my hands. Making a ball of my palms. I peeped through a gap between my fingers. It felt as if a small room is filled with magical light. Then I let it go. Somehow it made me think. Even this creature of night has light. Maybe God created things this way. Day and night both are needed . Darkness and light as well. I turned on bulb in my room. Some magic happened. Light emitting from the bulb opened my eyes. I thought that light does matter. And also life matters. Normal person mostly fears the dark. And tormented one loves it. So I guess it's ok to stay alone and befriend darkness. But after a while you definately need light. Light is the essence of everything. Even God .