lumos__

Forever trying to pen down the whirlpool inside my head.

Grid View
List View
Reposts
  • lumos__ 5d

    #dawn
    For the 9 word story prompt by @mirakee

    Ohmygod I can't believe this. @writersnetwork thank you so much for the repost. You just made my day! ��

    Read More

    Notwithstanding mankind's woes, the bright dawn heralds happier times.

    ©lumos__

  • lumos__ 1w

    "Too skinny, too fat,
    Too prude, too wild,
    Too dumb, too nerdy,
    But never good enough."

    People tell me that it gets better.
    That you eventually learn to live with the pain and name calling.
    So much so that one day you don't notice it anymore.

    And I don't know which one is worse-
    This constant gnawing thought of not being enough,
    Or accepting the fact that you'll never be, so that gradually the reminder doesn't hurt anymore.
    So that gradually it feels like the truth
    That you had to come in terms with.

    ©lumos__

  • lumos__ 5w

    #life

    Never. ;___;

    Read More

    Life is too short to sacrifice the last slice of pizza.
    ©lumos__

  • lumos__ 5w

    Life is too short to~

    • not pursue what moves you.
    • lose yourself trying to please others.
    • not reserve some love for yourself.
    • be spent crying over what ifs.
    • give up on your dreams.
    • chase someone else's definition of cool.
    ©lumos__

  • lumos__ 5w

    #miss #wander

    Have you ever missed someone when they were right in front of you?
    Has your mind wandered off to far off times when things were different?
    But now their words don't reach your brain and all you want to do is scream that you miss them,
    Over and over again.

    "It's all in my head," you justify with yourself.
    Sure, you talk to them everyday and have not had a disagreement for as long as you can remember,
    But there is this eerie feeling in your bones which you can't shake off no matter how hard you try.
    Something has shifted between both of you.
    Maybe too imperceptible and trivial to put an exact finger on it, but there's no room to deny it.
    You both realize this but are too afraid to admit, hoping against hope that this is all your imagination.
    But now, the laughter has become forced and the jokes repetitive.
    You've both run out of topics you could talk about and the silences have turned uncomfortable.
    You find yourself constantly reminding yourself that they are your topmost priority and it doesn't come naturally to you anymore.
    The warm memories do not scare away the dementors on a particularly dark night and although it scares you, you know there's not much you can do about it.
    So you both go round and round, trying hard to avoid the elephant in the room.
    After all, what more choice do you have rather than acting as if all is right and hope things get back to the way the had been?

    ©lumos__

    Read More

    .

  • lumos__ 6w

    I'm aware that perhaps this does not make much sense. ://

    Read More

    Sometimes we write,
    Not to send a message across;
    But rather, in the hope that
    Somewhere along the lines
    We'll start believing in it ourselves.

    ©lumos__

  • lumos__ 6w

    #love #loss

    Full circles

    The sky today resembles the day they first met.
    The shy sun peeking from behind cotton candy clouds floating in an azure ocean.
    Last night's vodka makes her head pound as she tries to open her eyes,
    And her hands register a strange vacancy on the other side of the bed.
    Figures morph before her,
    Not exactly figures, rather shadows.
    Shadows of the previous night's strife.
    Her ears ring with what was supposed to be their final conversation.
    Her heart aches with the finality of the situation.
    The dead phone screen shows her a tear streaked visage.
    She tries hard to remember the exact moment
    When they started fighting against each other
    Instead of having each other's backs while fighting against the world.

    The girl in the apartment in front of her tiptoes into her room.
    She locks the door and dials a familiar number,
    A number that has long been imprinted into her memory like the back of her hand.
    A pimply boy with a large mop of hair,
    And an even larger abyss of love for his first ever love, picks up the phone.
    They are careful to keep their voices low,
    And eager to hear the voice of their love.
    Stealing occasional glances toward the locked door
    With a maths book open in front lest a restless brother or a mischievous sister demanded to be let in,
    They build a future of their own in their mind.
    A future where they are adults, and in love with each other.
    A future where they don't need to make excuses to meet each other.

    Many miles away, a kindergartener celebrates his victory over his dad in a friendly game of basketball,
    While his old man pretends to bawl his eyes out.
    His laughter reminds you of chimes in a windy day,
    And if you looked closely, you'll see the pride in his father's eyes.
    His mother cheers on from the patio.
    Her heart swells with love for the two men in her life.
    Both of them fill her with joys previously foreign.
    And she sends a silent prayer of thanks to the heavens above,
    Remembering that day when she walked down the aisle,
    Josh, then four, following as a flower boy.
    Someday she'll make him understand what a stepdad really means,
    Till then she hopes that he follows her advice to always give love a chance.

    In another part of the world, the boy sees a shooting star.
    He closes his eyes and makes a wish into the universe.
    A wish as simple and old as life itself,
    A wish to be loved back by the person who means the world to him.
    So he wished for this and prayed that his wish was not lost in the sea of countless others.
    But something was different that night.
    Maybe it was the magic in the cold air that intoxicated him,
    Or maybe it was one of the many secret ways of universe unknown to mankind,
    He mustered the courage to finally text the girl,
    The girl who was a regular character in his dreams.
    The message was short and simple, unlike his feelings for her.
    "Hey I know this sounds crazy, but I love you, a lot.
    And though you're too good for me, the matters of the heart do not bow down to logic.
    It would make me the happiest man in the world if you decided to love me back."
    The silence that followed was the most excruciating seven minutes of his life.
    "Then let's make our love story the greatest," she blushed while clicking send.

    ©lumos__

    Read More

    Full circles

    .
    Give love a chance.
    ©lumos__

  • lumos__ 9w

    #capture

    For long I tried to capture the memories in perfect frames.
    Almost running with a net, chasing a rare butterfly,
    Trying to catch it before it flies away forever.
    I struggled to get the perfect lighting or correct contrast,
    Constantly anxious, lest I forget the experience due to the lack of a memorabilia.
    It took me long to realize that in the process of trying to pause them into stills,
    I failed to admire the fleeting beauty that lies in their transience.
    I failed to live then.

    ©lumos__

    Read More

    .

  • lumos__ 9w

    I has always admired your optimism,
    You promised you'd stitch back
    The ripped fabric of trust holding us together.
    But my love, I've seen, sometimes holding onto things
    Does more damage than letting go.
    And I would rather take the cues and leave,
    Than stay and wait in anticipation for the next tear.
    So please forgive me
    When you wake up to find me gone,
    Maybe, we were a set of lines destined to meet,
    But ultimately part.

    ©lumos__

  • lumos__ 9w

    #love #night #sky

    I had never shared your fascination with the sky,
    No matter how hard I tried to.
    But I listened in awe when you explained to me
    Things I didn't quite understood, but loved hearing nevertheless.

    You told me how the night sky was merely a huge blanket, woven with threads of magic,
    Guarding us from a world unimaginable, lying beyond it.
    I could not wrap my head around the thought when you casually explained
    That we were simultaneously looking at the past and the future.
    How eventually, we become a part of this very sky, a trinket on a Christmas tree,
    Returning home, after a long tiring journey as a human.

    I listened with my mouth agape,
    As if I could almost see the screws of your beautiful mind turning in perfect symphony,
    Their workings intricate, indecipherable by a novice like me.
    Myriad emotions and thoughts storming inside me as we lay beneath a canopy of stars,
    I wanted to understand everything about that sky you loved and held so dear.
    But was scared to ask questions lest I hindered your stream of thoughts.

    So we sat there, enamoured in comfortable silence,
    With you drawing imaginary tangents in the dark sky, joining one star to the other,
    Almost like the game of connect-the-dots that came with the newspaper every Wednesday back in childhood,
    And me sitting next to you, admiring the glimmer in your eyes,
    We both were looking at someone we loved.
    And in that moment, there was no place I'd rather be.

    I don't exactly remember how or who started it,
    But I distinctly remember the taste of your lips, remnant of the chocolate dessert with a hint of peppermint.
    We kissed with the stars as a witness to our love,
    And I took the bright moonlight as a sign of a happier future.
    We looked up to see a shooting star,
    Closing my eyes, I wished for you.

    ______________________________________________________

    Yesterday brought one of those nights when the warm memories fail to scare away the coldness within,
    I tried to find comfort in your thick jumper but the chill made me shiver.
    Looking at old polaroids that hold your happy smile, I found myself questioning whether it had been me imagining the entire time,
    Mindless, desperate for comfort, I found myself walking the steps to the place I knew I'd find you in.

    Not much had changed since the first time we had been there.
    Sure there were a few trees which weren't present two summers back,
    And someone's father had installed a small swing set at the far end,
    But the sky, it seemed the same with maybe a few new stars adorning it.

    I knew you saw me then,
    I knew you saw me from up above, trying to figure out which one of them were you.
    I combed my mind for forgotten detail disguinging as an untangled mass of useless trivia,
    Anything, everything, that could help me identify you.

    My eyes were wet against my wish of putting up a brave front before you
    And as I sat there huddled up, surrounded by the ghosts of our old selves,
    The moonlight grew brighter,
    And I knew it was a signal from you.
    I looked up to see a shooting star,
    Closing my eyes, I wished for you.

    ©lumos__

    Read More

    ©lumos__