melva_j

I am the frozen music

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  • melva_j 12w

    SILK

    You're like fine silk
    made of special threads
    in unique weaves
    The kind that glides through finger rings
    The kind they don't make anymore
    The kind people wear their chappals out
    searching for
    In the small old shops
    that have rustic lamps,
    in the alleyways of meandering streets
    in Calcutta
    Only to realise under the flickering yellow lamps
    that they will never get to have it
    That it will only be a thing of their imagination
    The silk of their dreams.
    You're the silk of men's dreams.
    ©melva_j

  • melva_j 17w

    Fallen, lost and strolled too far

    When I walked on the edge
    I was afraid I might lose my hold
    and fall over
    So I thought I'll descend back,
    But it was never possible,
    The step was too low or
    what was beyond kept
    Luring me into the, abyss if you may
    And then I thought,
    Alright I'll just let me fall,
    I'll figure out how to climb over later.



    During the fall,
    I was afraid I was gonna lose myself
    Not whole but in parts
    Yet eventually lose
    a bit of the essence itself,
    Lose my way in the dark depths
    Of this emotion, whatever it was
    But I thought, no, it's okay
    I'll just find my way back to the cliff.


    As I strolled through the bottom,
    Trying to find the foot of the cliff
    But in effect, wandering further away
    With each step,
    I kept thinking,
    What if I stroll too far and never return?
    But my pace kept steady
    Or got quicker, I should say
    And I thought, don't worry,
    You'll return.


    But here I stand now,
    Fallen into,
    Lost myself to,
    And strolled a bit further to
    You.


    Here I am stranded on your shores


    I don't see any boats to take me back
    Nor can I swim
    I could try,
    but I can see that I'll drown
    So I've decided to make a tent,
    Start a fire,
    Rest for the days
    And wait for the boat
    That will eventually pass by.


    What gives me hope
    When I lay down in the sand
    And look at the night sky,
    Is the thought that somewhere
    In the island that's me,
    You are stranded too,
    Fallen, lost and strolled too far
    Just like me.


    ©melva_j

  • melva_j 24w

    Letting you go

    Every time I step into this house,
    My gaze wanders to the room in the East
    As if a habit I can't seem to stop
    And always, I find the empty bed.
    The pillows perfectly placed,
    The bedspread neat, without creases
    The cotton sarees have left the hangers
    the dressing mirror is stained,
    And I can't see my face in it anymore
    All the plates in the kitchen
    have been dry for months now,
    And the weeds have started
    creeping into the backyard.
    Leaning on the kitchen verandah door,
    It finally crept on to me; the void
    The absence,
    which was left of her presence now
    And I weeped.
    I didn't want to,
    I wanted to keep my tears
    I wanted her to stay in that suffocation,
    In that ache in my chest,
    Yet I let it flow,
    I let her out.
    I lost her twice, once in her deathbed
    And the second time
    When I finally let her go.
    ©melva_j

  • melva_j 24w

    Often

    I wish to be the rain you love so much,
    So that I get to visit you
    every once in a while,
    During the cold evenings,
    When the sky is an unthinkable mix
    Of crimson and blue,
    Just how we were,
    And yet make that beautiful view,
    Just as we were.

    ©melva_j

  • melva_j 24w

    Dear Sadako

    Every day, for years
    You expected tomorrow
    To be kinder
    The day to be warmer
    And the night to be calmer
    And your hopes, you folded Into
    a thousand paper cranes,
    Expecting them to free you.
    Yet you knew, in your heart you knew,
    That tomorrow was going to be worse,
    Much worse than today
    And in that you had found a strange calm
    A strange satisfaction.
    You had learnt
    that the beauty of today
    Was in the understanding that
    It is possibly much better
    Than what tomorrow is gonna be
    And today,
    You were less of a Hibakusha
    Than you will be
    Tomorrow.

    ©melva_j

  • melva_j 25w

    HOME

    I let the garbs fall off at the door
    Untied the mask at the living
    Took off the necklace by the mirror and
    Removed the body paint by the night stand.
    Releasing my body, naked,
    I let it hit the mattress with a thud
    And the ache made me smile.
    The day's chapter was done
    And tomorrow will be another story.
    In the constant theatre that life is,
    Home is the only place I was me.

    ©melva_j

  • melva_j 26w

    BEFORE

    Before you stop looking at me,
    Erase the memory of your eyes from me.
    Before you drop my hand,
    Guide me to walk by myself.
    Before you pack your bags
    Make me forget your scent in my shirts
    And before you leave,
    Teach me how to not love you.


    ©melva_j

  • melva_j 27w

    I TRUST YOU

    I tread by the shallow stream
    Doubting whether I should wet my feet
    Or drench my skirt right at the hem
    And get back on the shore
    And not paddle deep
    Or if I should take a dive
    And explore the depths,
    what if it brought me to the hidden oysters
    I step back every minute
    and look at the sky for a sign of any kind
    A star that shimmers,
    Or a comet passing by,
    That would let me put the blame
    Of my momentary decision
    On that magic of the universe
    And call it a twist of fate
    A draw played by the hands of time,
    Yet deep in my mind
    In the floor bed of my heart,
    I know that I want to immerse myself
    In the clear water of the gentle stream,
    On this cold, yet bright night of the full moon,
    And abandon myself in that oblivion.
    Then, right there, that's where I see you
    With your arm outstretched
    And the most reassuring smile,
    As you take my hand in yours,
    And guide me into the water
    All the while facing me, just how I beg you to,
    And the smile never leaving your face,
    Becoming the guide of my mind
    in the conflict it is in now,
    Your eyes could drown me
    In the black orbs they are
    Yet, they twinkle in the moonlight
    Making me believe that the
    'magic of the universe' I was hoping for
    Is right there, in you.

    ©melva_j

  • melva_j 32w

    DECEIT

    To reach a heaven we have never seen,
    We forgo the earth we walk upon daily,
    To please a god we are yet to meet,
    We sacrifice other of his own creations
    If empathy and love is what God is made of,
    Am telling you, he is disappointed now
    Cause the heaven is on this earth,
    You've just turned blind to it,
    And the god is in you,
    You've just forgotten it.

    ©melva_j

  • melva_j 34w

    NOT ALONE

    Today I sat on my swing
    Rolled my head back and laid down
    Gently being swayed by the wind...
    The world looked easier then, upside down
    Cause everything seemed to be
    barely hanging on
    Just like me.
    ©melva_j