She love him That's why she chose To swim with him deeply Even if there's no assurance that he will hold her enough and not let her go when her heart cramps cause she know to herself that she can't swim but she can drown
She once lost as she misses the bus. Somewhere out of no where she walks and the only thing she has is fear of something she doesn't know— the unfamiliar feeling.
It's been quite a while that she remains at that house, that she fails to remember what direction to take.She stay so long in house of someone who she feels comfortable with.But that person is stranger and the house is not meant for her to be welcome and stay.Now she been kicked out, been lost and found herself in dead end.
She never thought that she would be able to see her own abandoned home where she left her missing pieces that makes her whole once again.At that moment she realized that she never missed the bus neither the house she been kicked out but she misses her old home and old self.
So whenever she stuck at the last road and last hope she always remembers how she found herself.
Started crawling in my skin Insecurity spin the walls caving in so i talked my self down don't need to laugh cause I'm clown living in this self hate downtown
Why am I feeling lonely When a lot of people is around me? Why am I not still happy? If somebody loves me?
Do I need to be water well? Just to make myself well? Should I be proud to have lots of friends align? When self don't know to be a good friend of mine?
I used to try anything but everybody's staring It's a a room full of rumor and my self is one of abuser
Always wondering what is happening Should I blame myself for this thing? Should I blame myself for letting them in? Should I blame myself for breathing?
I was dying to escape myself Like a creature reaching the delph But who's gonna help? If the antagonist is self
It's like a movie that haven't seen by anybody there were actors pretending that happiness has no ending
I'm the writer of the script and the paper is to let the heart reap Then mind is director upkeep To let my self made, the greatest freak
So hey! self hear me now You need to love your scars somehow Feel better in your skin and begin, To see the things that all go wrong Is where perfection belong I won't say it all gets better But somehow, self love make us strong forever.
Everything was normal for next couple days. No weirdos, no unknown calls, no stupid texts. It was almost as if nothing happened. But those calls started again. He would just call her, wait for her to pick up, call back again if she doesn't pick up, completely silent if someone else picked up instead of her, text her if she picked up once and then shouted and hung up. It was making her crazy. She couldn't sleep, couldn't focus on her homework. She freaked out every single time that phone rang and would run and grab it to see if it was him or someone else.
After a while, every ringing phone started giving her chills and she would just black out for a second or two. Initially she thought that whoever that person was, he would just realise that she was not interested in whatever shit was going in his head but it just kept getting worse. It was pretty obvious that it was now just a game for him and he was really enjoying it. There were moments when she wanted to talk to her parents about what was happening and it would all go away but then she also didn't knew what their reaction to that situation will be like. Her parents were not the kind of people who were really friendly and open with their kids so she wasn't sure if she could trust them or not. It was just a lot for her little brain. She just stopped talking. She tried talking to Ritika but all she got from her was, "I told him that it's not my number. I asked him not to call you. I can't do anything if he doesn't listen."
It continued for 6 months. He initially used to call after her school when she was at home but then he went on to calling her when she was in school. Her mother once picked up the call but he didn't said anything as he didn't recognised her voice. She didn't tried calling back thinking it was a wrong number. Once, she was watching TV with her father when the phone rang. Her father was about to answer it but she got to it first. "Hello?", she said. He started talking rubbish like always once he recognised her voice. Her father was still sitting right next to her so she just disconnected the call and told her father that it was a computer call.
The moment she said it, she realised that it was a mistake. She should have said it was a wrong number because he was going to call back again and it would look bad. He called back again and this time, her father answered it. He kept saying "hello" but no one answered back from the other side. He disconnected the call thinking that it might be some network issue. That was the moment she knew she had to really do something about it. She had to tell an adult, anyone but her parents, just in case the situation got out of control. She thought about it for days and made a plan that was really risky but at the same time, sounded pretty much perfect in her head. She decided to talk to Ritika again and ask her to talk to that person and make it all stop before she actually carried on with the plan. Her reaction was, "you can do whatever you want. I don't care about you. You can't do anything. All you have is just words". That's the kind of motivation Aayasha was looking for so she left by saying, "you asked for it".
She wrote a letter for Ritika's aunt explaining everything, gave it to her 6 years old daughter and asked her to give it to her mother the moment she reach home after school. She had a lot going in her head that day. All the possibilities of it all going wrong and biting her in the ass, what might be happening in their house, what if she decides to come over and talk to her parents? She couldn't sleep, partly because of the fear that everything might go wrong and partly because she felt like she betrayed her friend. Next morning, she saw Ritika in the school bus. It was written all over her face that she has been crying. Later that day, Ritika's aunt came to talk to her after school. She already got a heads up about it from one of Ritika's cousin in the morning so she was prepared for it. The moment she saw her in school, her first instinct was to run away because she had no idea what that conversation was going to be like but then she had to go see her because one of her teacher got involved. It was not a pleasant conversation but it could have been much worse so she was a bit satisfied. She gave that phone number to her aunt and that teacher when they asked for it. That person never called her again and her parents never found out anything about it. That number was printed in every single cell of her brain by then and she knew that she was probably never going to forget it.