Russsian/Lithuanian by birth. Lithuanian upbringing. American af. U.S. army veteran, poet, biker, fighter and streamer on mixer

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  • oogiethemad1 8w


    Not really sure what's there to talk about
    I like to drink and fight
    Cocaine all night
    Tall walls to show that it's alright

    Inside the castle there's somebody laughed
    Oh what elaborate fasad
    Let's have a feast amidst the drought
    The smile says: "it's not that bad"

  • oogiethemad1 12w


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    Almost honest

    Wish that I was weak
    Wish I was getting bullied
    But I always fought back like freak
    Being admired, felt like no one knew me truly

    I'm to strong to be susceptible
    Yet not enough to be acceptable
    Strong brute is what's respectable
    Your friend, I am respectable

    Self pity is a bitch
    Breakdown makes me a snitch
    You never checked me out on twitch
    I present the laughs at mental switch

  • oogiethemad1 15w

    Rest In Peace

    There's a song I can't hear any more
    Empty bottle, glaring cold from the floor
    There's a difference, between bottle and you
    I can talk to the bottle, but I can't talk to you.

    You were young and by god I miss you.
    I feel numb, I don't know what to do
    You had all, I must keep going on
    You gave all, brother know I'm not done

    Empty bottle, don't bring warmth to the heart.
    Unlike soul that you had, it was always so kind
    What to say, I will always love you
    Where I go, I'll never have you

    Rest in peace, I will keep keeping on
    Rest in peace, I will not let you down
    Don't stay here, spread your both wings and fly
    Don't stay here and I'll try not to cry

  • oogiethemad1 31w

    For you

    This might as well be the last letter that has ever been
    Forgive me son, for your father's full of sin
    You need to understand that for your life I gave myself to the mill
    You need to understand that I loved you like none ever will

    And I understand there things you're hearing too
    I know right now I'm not get through to you
    Alienation is a batch and I feel it too
    Understand there isn't anything I wouldn't so for you

    I understand that at this time I'm not a thing to you
    It's also very true I try my best for you
    You don't owe, but I've died for you
    I hope one day you read this and these words ring true

  • oogiethemad1 60w


    Ripped my heart out of my chest
    It's in the open like the rest
    Watch it beating in my hand
    The pain was just to much to stand

    I gave my eyes out
    Just so some could see
    Gave piece of mind away
    So you could be free

    There are parts I haven't gave out
    Because they'd kill you
    I say these things to loud
    To spare you

    I seem calm on a surface
    But there's a lot of anger in me
    I seem strong on the outside
    But the pain just won't let me be

    I fight demons like breathing
    Don't underestimate me
    It's all locked up but it's teething
    Darkness you'll never see

  • oogiethemad1 65w

    With you

    So many have died
    And part of me has died with you
    You couldn't cry
    So I cry for you

    You had leave
    I couldn't leave with you
    Life is short
    But I live for you

    So please just sing my love
    As I think of you
    I had so much to say
    But the words won't come through

    Life is hard
    Wish I'd die with you
    But I keep on fighting
    As I always do

  • oogiethemad1 65w

    Bottom of the bottle

    Bottom of the bottle is a trusted end
    Same place is my only friend
    Lost heart to faceless
    Simply couse I cared

    Bottom of the barrel
    Has engraved my name
    Feeling lost and feral
    Hoping it's the end

    Gave up love for violence
    Solidtude and silence
    Echo in my head
    Feeling dry and dead

  • oogiethemad1 79w

    Just for today

    Trying to say a prayer, but I don't know no God
    I'm being self destructive, I just don't give a fuck
    I'll kill myself just to let you breath
    Stay in a cell so you can travel seas

    Beat fist into these walls so you can leave
    Burned myself into ashes, to feed a tree and now breathe
    Explain my pain through rhymes
    Guess I'm just dropping dimes

    I just don't know how else to explain
    Just a "gorilla" trying to pertain
    I'm in a lot o pain today
    Just trying to sustain

  • oogiethemad1 82w

    Secret rooms

    There are rooms in my mind
    That I don't visit anymore
    Rape, abuse, losses, reasons I fight
    All closed behind hidden door

    I'm afraid to move from this comfort zone
    Because honesty yields demons I don't know anymore
    And I'm not sure if reflection is hate or fear
    Definently not it's not the strength that reflects in the mirror

    Somethings should be spoken outloud
    But showing damage isn't allowed
    Congratulations, closed rooms are the reason to fight
    Like that somehow magically makes it alright

    Worst part, I'm not the only one
    Bashing fists at the wall
    Wishing it was all done
    Embracing this spiteful throne

    So many hidden rooms
    No one's talking about
    Acting like fires are fumes
    There's no value to mount

  • oogiethemad1 83w


    I got a note pad and a pen
    Anxiety strangling me again
    There's so much I want to say
    But the words come up so plain

    I feel like I miss the mark
    How to embrace light
    While living in the dark
    Some days this is my only spark

    And even so I remain glad
    Leave myself no time to feel sad
    There's just to much life yet to be had
    Another day, another fight