• phatspitz 5w

    Breakfast at Claridges

    Breakfast at Claridge's
    Petrol in garages
    Petrifying marriages
    Huge bills for damages

    Water damage feeds some families
    Particularly the families of water damage repair workers
    And many a man's pain and misfortune makes many a doctor a small fortune
    We all play our part, dancing on our creaky, rickety stages leaving not so much as a foot print across the Rock of ages

    I'm missing you like crazy
    And I don't like crazy
    I've got work to do
    Which only makes me feel more lazy

    She got up early this morning
    Mounted her horse
    Set off on a new course
    In search of the triangle people
    And a pointed steeple to worship
    "Get up and pack your things
    We are going somewhere we belong"

    Men who sing with a high voice, like women, get a lot of women
    But most of them seem to want men these days
    The more beautiful and heartbroken the more you get laid
    The more shrill the better the thrill and chill, the more you get paid.

    People are very complex
    With complex complexions
    Imperfections abound
    Especially Wrinkles around the eyes
    The tracks of time never lie
    Unless you can afford a plastic surgeon

    I didn't leave a note
    Not a word
    No one even knew I had gone
    Up at 5.00 am, I brushed my teeth
    Out the door by six
    I'm the early bird
    Off to take my pick of the fat worms

    Day turns to night, I enjoy the fight and the fruits of my labour
    A fat worm or two to savour, with a not so fine wine
    Time to consider my behaviour
    Make amends with my neighbour

    I don't fear death, I fear life
    I fear God and I fear my wife
    She has all power to bring me low
    But I can't lose my cool or let frustration show
    Or some new fresh hell I will quickly come to know

    There is no other fool like you in the world
    You're supposed to be a big tuff farmer
    But a sad song can make you unfurl
    And crumple and weep
    Yet With a little luck and a fair wind
    We still find sleep
    It was hiding under a blanket all along
    It was standing in the wings
    Like a wall flower and a sad song

    My life feels like an advertising break
    With no show. Like a fast car that won't go
    Like a light bulb with no glow
    But I'm okay with that, though.
    I won't weaken or get slack yo

    Everything wears out and dies
    Every set of eyes cries
    Even the bluest of blue skies
    Is black at night. Am I right?
    Even the newest of new ties
    Is useless without a knot in its throat

    I don't wish to gloat
    But I know everything about nothing
    And nothing about everything
    I'm smarter than a stadium full of atheist Astro physicists
    I've got more style than a Hair Stylist.
    I am the goose in the goose step fascist

    Twenty years ago
    Feels just like today
    I communicate telepathically
    Because my lips just will not say
    But my telepathy is pathetic
    And my apathy is apathetic
    Lately I've been about as athletic
    As a fence post
    Sleeping more than most
    With much sleep comes much tiredness
    But I love that new song I heard on the wireless
    It's restored my faith in music again
    I play it over and over and over again.
    And I really don't care if it drives the neighbours insane
    I've got nothing left to lose and even less to gain

    ┬ęphatspitz