I know i should be around people, but i honestly dont want to.
I feel like i have to hide in plain site, make people think everythings alright.
Its easier to be alone, listen to the wind chimes.
i close my eyes and picture where i thought id be, happy, smiling, having you here, i try to believe the lie.
The puppies cries bring me back to reality, im here, its all still real.
the want to have everything be over, no more pain, not have to feel, its always on my mind.
"Life goes on" "grass is always greener" the bullshit people tell you when they know its not true.
Ive been on the other side, im halfway there now. Maybe my perch is to low, Maybe they just had a better view.
For now ill keep walking the fence, keep climbing the wire, try to see what they see. Hopefully there is something there.
Otherwise, when i fall, i dont plan on getting back up. The pain, the heartbreaking vice on my chest, is to much to bare.