• cactuspenguin 6w

    Not sure what exactly prompted me to go this direction, but here ya go! #writingcontest #creativearena #tree #sarcastic #funny #dark #morbid

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    From the eyes of a tired and sarcastic tree

    It's been 352 years.
    I'm tired.
    I just wanna die.
    Someone please cut me down.

    Ah, just swell.
    Here come those teenagers.
    They're gonna make out under me again, aren't they?
    Of course, just what I need.
    What losers.

    Ugh. Bleh.
    I hear them kissing.
    They're moaning too.
    Oh, they're stripping now.
    I'm gonna get 'em...

    I dropped a branch.
    One got a concussion.
    The other one's crying on the phone.
    I hear sirens.

    One of the dads has a chainsaw.
    They're finally gonna cut me down.
    Oh joy!
    Just what I wanted!

    I'm staring to think.
    I'm starting to really think.
    It's a little late, as the chainsaw's getting closer.
    But I'm still thinking.

    Maybe that was a bad idea.
    Maybe I shouldn't terrorize horny teenagers.
    Maybe I actually want my life.
    Maybe I just need more excitement.
    Eh. Whatever!

    ┬ęCactus Penguin