• butitrefused 5w

    There has always been something...missing. Or forgotten. Or lost. Something that I had once, and don't have anymore.

    I've tried many different things to remedy this feeling: most of the time it feels like hunger. I'll eat. It'll feel like thirst, so I'll drink. It'll feel like a raging, out of control monster that is on the brink of stripping away my entire existence, drowning in its own fury. I'll fight. It'll become a little child, crying incessantly but unable to articulate its desire. I'll cry. It'll be a black hole, where I feel nothing, want nothing, need nothing; I only want to cease to be, to exist at all. I'll collapse in on myself and speak to no one.

    Can you look at me and see all this? Will I ever find what I need, what I want, or whatever it is I've forgotten?

    Or are we always like this...going through life missing pieces of ourselves, never to find them again?

    #musings #writersnetwork #pod @writersnetwork #mirakee #writing #forgotten #melancholy

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