There are stars in my smile
And they form small constellations to hold onto people.
My comfort and trust were travellers,
Staying in anyone, who shows a flicker of care.
Maybe my hollowness was full of itself
And I had no room to share.
Comfort now shivers in a dark corner,
Refusing to come out and soak reality.
Trust comes home once a year, shakes its head
And takes a U-turn
But not before promising another visit.
It tells me,
"If upto me, I would've cut all ties,
But my lover, hope, thinks it ain't right."
Insecurities tip-toes in the room as I write,
Hand in hand with its best friend, doubt.
They sparkle their magic glitter and I feel dizzy,
All that is not me, shines bright.
So bright I thought I'm black and hollow.
Oh wait. I am.
And as the dizziness disappears,
It takes away a little of me with it.
Somedays pride, somedays confidence.
Today though, a gust hollers from my favorite window,
The only clean and pure thing in this room
And as I try to digest the fact
That the last good thing inside is about to get tainted;
The window overhauls the hollers to sounds
And I feel it before I see it, loneliness.
I close my eyes and wait for sadness and fear to come through,
But they don't.
I see light, blinding light,
I see stars of my smile, smiling in their own light.
Then, loneliness makes a sound
And everything falls into place.