• winter_dreams 5w

    Hello everyone. I'm back. Kinda? Did y'all miss me?

    Okay. So I have a lot to say. I missed mirakee soooo much.
    I forgot how I could write whatever I want here.
    I've been a lil antisocial lately. It's like a lot of things making sense all at once and it gets a lil too much sometimes .

    I feel guilt, embarrassment, resent, regret but the feeling that gave me the final push to download mirakee again was...
    I realized that we're all alone, fighting our own battles in this world and for the first time this doesn't scare me or makes me sad. I don't know. For the first time in forever, I don't feel like I need someone's attention. I'm happy having my own attention.

    Here's a piece from the mess of my ocean :)

    #mirakee #writersnetwork

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    There are stars in my smile
    And they form small constellations to hold onto people.
    My comfort and trust were travellers,
    Staying in anyone, who shows a flicker of care.
    Maybe my hollowness was full of itself
    And I had no room to share.

    Comfort now shivers in a dark corner,
    Refusing to come out and soak reality.
    Trust comes home once a year, shakes its head
    And takes a U-turn
    But not before promising another visit.
    It tells me,
    "If upto me, I would've cut all ties,
    But my lover, hope, thinks it ain't right."

    Insecurities tip-toes in the room as I write,
    Hand in hand with its best friend, doubt.
    They sparkle their magic glitter and I feel dizzy,
    All that is not me, shines bright.
    So bright I thought I'm black and hollow.
    Oh wait. I am.
    And as the dizziness disappears,
    It takes away a little of me with it.
    Somedays pride, somedays confidence.

    Today though, a gust hollers from my favorite window,
    The only clean and pure thing in this room
    And as I try to digest the fact
    That the last good thing inside is about to get tainted;
    The window overhauls the hollers to sounds
    And I feel it before I see it, loneliness.
    I close my eyes and wait for sadness and fear to come through,
    But they don't.
    I see light, blinding light,
    At midnight.
    I see stars of my smile, smiling in their own light.
    Then, loneliness makes a sound
    And everything falls into place.