• ravstorm 23w

    Because of Him

    I remember this one time when I was younger, my dad was very angry during breakfast. My older sister took my brother and I upstairs to eat so we wouldn't be bothered by him. We listened to him yell and scream at my mother downstairs. This didn't affect me much. It was a normal occurrence. I was used to it. So I just sat with my siblings and ate my eggs.

    Later that day, my dad asked my brother and I if we were bothered by his yelling. We said no. Not only because we were used to it, but because if we said yes, the yelling would get worse. He said okay and didn't say anything else to my brother and I, however, that wasn't the case with my sister. Instead of yelling at my mom, he started yelling at her. He yelled and yelled. He shoved her against a wall by her throat. She was trying to protect us, but made things worse for herself.

    I didn't know then that in my future, I would be held by my neck against the same wall. He was choking me. I was screaming. He let go of me and left the room. I took the dog outside so I could take a breather and control myself. When I went back inside, I was greeted by my mom who told me that I should've known better. That I should've known that my actions and my words would anger him. Blaming me, when he was the one who shoved me against a wall; the one who yelled and screamed at me; the one who did the same thing to everyone who has lived in this miserable house.

    This house has never been a happy home. Never truly happy. There's always been a darkness. Sure, there have been good days. Days with minimal anger and pain. Whenever I have been happy in this house, there's always been a dark cloud that floats above me, just waiting to start a storm. One minute I could be feeling on top of the world, and the next I could be laying on the ground, unable to get up. Everyday I fear that he'll leave a spot on my face that my friends will see and I'll have to lie about how I got it. Everyday I fear that this is going to be the day that he beats me to the point where I have to go to the hospital. Everyday I fear for my life, because of him.