• eri_oye 9w

    MY ADDICTION

    "What's going to happen to me if I do this? How will I cope if this happens to me, let's assume it does? When I finish writing this, I'll take a while to rest, I'll have to eat too. I'm sooooo hungry. But what happens if the food doesn't get ready on time? My stomach ache will get worse? It's not like I'm feeling sleepy like that o, but I'm too hungry to stay awake..........." This mind won't stop wandering.
    I can't help it really, but I'm addicted to thinking. It's positive sometimes, other times, it's negative..........both times, it's overboard. Every time, it's deep. Sometimes, I try to control it, other times, I give myself to it. Sometimes, an incidence births it, other times, it just pops into my head. Sometimes, I do it intentionally, other times, it comes without my permission. Sometimes, it's analysis paralysis, other times, it's just me, being careful. Sometimes I'm unnecesarily worrying, other times, I'm simply trying to avoid a mistake.
    In all, I've identified it as my addiction, consciously or unconsciously, I find myself in it. I'm trying hard to curb it — at least, the negative part of it — because it has denied me some opportunities (analysis paralysis). It has made me start some things over again. It has even made me lose some valuable things forever.
    Even as it is an addiction, it has served me in some ways too. It has helped me escape some things. It has helped me enjoy some opportunities. It has helped me 'eat the good of some lands'. It has proven to be a way of escape for me from some evil I had no idea about — because it took me a long time to brood over it.
    Dear reader, the simple thing is.......... I'm not going to drop this addiction and lose all its benefits, neither will I continue with it so much that it keeps harming me.......... I'll simply look for that balance and strike it hard!

    Identify yours too and do the same, darling.
    ©eri_oye