recluse

www.instagram.com/recluseramblings

��Overthinker �� Philocalist �� Ambivert ��

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  • recluse 8w

    In ankhon mein,
    Kabhi neend basti hai toh kabhi sapne
    Un sapnon main ek sapna tumhara bhi hai
    Par itna kareeb nahi hai wo abhi,
    Ankhein palak jhapka leti hai,
    Aur tum beech main aa jate ho,
    Fir ek sapna bankar.
    ©recluse

  • recluse 9w

    She is there, living,
    looking for things that still has life
    And the reason to live for,
    She is there,
    But not waiting or wanting
    For you to see her,
    She is there,
    And she will be there
    Smiling and shattering
    At the same time.
    ©recluse

  • recluse 9w

    She will never ask you to bring her moon and stars from the sky,
    But just your hand holding hers when you both look at them together.
    You see, she is a simple girl, who dreams these little things which are big enough for her and she wish for them to come true someday.
    ©recluse

  • recluse 9w

    Only if i knew,
    That these forever also end,
    I would have hugged you longer
    Everytime we met, living my forever in those moments.
    ©recluse

  • recluse 10w

    Soft music makes your heart dance to go back to those feelings with someone again, old or new doesn't matter.
    ©recluse

  • recluse 10w

    Personal. Ignore.

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    I told myself a 100 times that it is not good to text again but this urge of texting overpowered one day and that Hi was send, i often find myself in a movie like situation or just my mind assumes that for me, so here is how that urge was planted in my mind, i was fourteen i think when we met in a engagement ceremony and talked for a while, your role in the family was totally understandable/relatable when people were asking you to do so many things and looking at you as you were youngest of all and i just observed all that because i am also the youngest in my family, you were wearing that white shirt which matched your skin and smile ofcourse, i am still fan of your smile, i know i never confessed that before or maybe i did i just don't remember much details because of my age. So after that we were connected through facebook then to phone texts then to some calls in a day, i remember how i used to jump over my mother's phone to read your text you can say forwarded whatsapp of that time and one such message asked to choose some number to tell you something as far as i remember and those replies ended up in saying i love you to each other. I really enjoyed texting and talking to you now i just think you were a person with whom i used to spend so much time that eventually leads to these feelings. you were few years elder than me but never realised what we are doing is wrong as we don't hold much future because of Indian society norms or culture i don't know how to explain and realising that for some time i made up my mind to end it myself and i called you to say that i won't call or text again and you should do the same, i don't remember the reason I told you, whether i told you that my parents got to know about us or i have another person whom i like but seeing you again in such functions was a treat to my eye, your humbe Hi is still in my ears with that smile, i did not know how to respond that day and then you were all so busy but my heartbeat was frozen for a moment when i don't know accidentally or purposely you came and stand by me while i was with my family, i wish i could have stayed longer in such events so that i could have talked to you in person rather than thinking about it for a hundred times on social media and then only to confess that my previous relationship whose photos you have seen ended because he had trust issues with me and you telling me that you are in five years long distance relationship and before this conversation you shared your number saying i will call you if no one else talk to you, then you got busy and said i will talk to you later, after a day, again thinking for it a long while when i texted you on your number you said we will talk at night and since my read receipt is off i don't even know if my okay is read yet. All i want to say that one should not pretend all good to people if they really don't feel so in their hearts, you should say directly what hurts and try to move on instead of just pretending that you like the fact someone texted you first.

  • recluse 10w

    I don't want my whole life to revolve around one man but still it means so much to me being loved and loving someone for my entire life.

  • recluse 10w

    Sometimes you don't seek love but acceptance of all your flaws you carry with you, all your mistakes which you did in the past and a hand or a hug which will not change even after hearing all that, fingers still crossed or hug carrying the same warmth.
    ©recluse

  • recluse 10w

    On someday you wake up with realisation that sunshine has not brought light in your way and you are still alone even after the night.
    You don't wish to turn in different direction in your bed, let alone think of getting out of it.
    You had these thoughts inside you fighting battles in your head while your silence speaks to the world.
    You realise that this world you read about is another's planet hell and you don't even know where you belong.
    You are no good to be remembered by anyone and you are so peaceful with this thought when it strikes your head that when you will be laying down lifeless no one will be crying after you except your family. The people who may know you might call after months only to hear that the person you are trying to reach is far far away from your reach now. You see that no one waits for anyone and world move on anyway. And still some people are struggling to make an identity in it and be something to satisfy their self ego and gain respect, where in the end it's all about this realisation that you are no one in this universe, just an atom.
    ©recluse

  • recluse 14w

    On some days i miss you as the person i could reach to at any time, day or night did not matter. You were my go to person for happy and sad times, for sharing happiness we can find many people in row while sadness is not easily shared. It's hard to express and more hard to find people to listen and then might understand. It's not always you can just poke someone and irritate them with whatever hurt your mind is carrying and heart is feeling.
    ©recluse