Racism runs deep down in this earth. An abstract form of devil which needs to be captured. God has made us in different colours but he had embedded the same beating heart and thoughtful mind in us. Then, what power to we hold to discriminate anyone? To make them feel inferior?, let their voice down? Or take their rights away?
Im deeply heartwrenched. What in a world have we started living in.! What sad days is being enveloped into, Are we really becoming so blind and cold hearted!
This needs to be stopped! Everyone has the right to be heard! All colours of life matter!
Im excited, nervous and happy all at the same time. It is like a mixed feelings and I can't predict but you know Im just going with a flow. I wanted to share few thoughts on this day.
1. Age is just a number as true as they say, I can't believe Im 20. Legit! I feel I do hold a heart of kid, super sensitive. I still watch Shinchan and Mr. Bean. Cry a lot. Doodle weird stuffs. I always demand Ice cream from my dad. (That too the specific magnum chocolate bar) My eyes still lit up with icecreams, balloons and chocolates.
2. Im officially 20 today and I still don't know how to drive a car. (My parents are super concerned with my impulsive behaviour they would prefer dropping me in car or appoint a driver than letting me take the car) I can't cook well and I hold a biggest stage fear. (But you know what Im lil bit working on all the spheres)
3. I feel and Ive mentioned several times in this app that I was and still am a migraine patient and had severe deppresion during my early teen years. I guess I should not been so rigid on myself.
That feeling of embracing has came very late to me when I was 19, I wìsh I was fearless and cared less about opinions. (Folks listen to your heart but when it comes to carrier then do listen to your parents and experienced people)
4. Friends.! This word itself sound so secure and comfortable. No matter how old you get Real friends will stay in touch with you and others will fade away with time. Family is important no matter what! Surround yourself with them, love them, make memories with them because you don't know what life is going to bring things towards you or maybe it would be your last day on this planet.
5. At the end I would say, Live a little. Don't overthink of future, for now be happy. Do what you like, make your day a bit productive.
I want to heartly thank this app and people whom I call angels because you guys supported and were there for me when I needed the most. Never in my life I thought I'll recieve love from Virtual world.
I've successfully aced my teen years and sad that my mistakes won't be counted and forgiven easily emtionally as well as legally because that is only valid when you're a teen. Lol.
Im feeling blessed, I aim to be a much better person than ever. I really want to say yes to every opportunities which will lift me up. Im excited to learn more, evolve more in this journey. Buckled up to meet people more. Im turning more of my attention to Almighty because that's my meditation zone and spiritual peace. I look forward for being more positive as well as critically observing all the communications, social areas and negative things. I've set goals to wake up early, eat healthy, be in touch with constant exercise, do savings more keenly and above all embrace myself and love my parents a bit more.
Thanks for being with me in this journey. Sending my hugs and kisses, xoxo
When chaos of indignant Home sapiens ripple pain in cochlea, Even the aura's alew betrays decanted glee, Bullets of exhaust, I hit on fuschia paper of Pillows, fires back on me, alpha particles of pessimism clearly pass through thin gold foil of my heart.
Pecan latibule, only escape from the Hireath, Six years ago, reluctant task to build an Archaic house, much to ask for, to this Nerd cat, purring over books, bibliosmia, Never knew, it was the main ingredient to Pacify a forlorn misanthrope, away from rantipole weeds of hysteria.
Sapphire nepenthe and passel, Dern, incidents, Of merry and longanimity, whelved safe, In the crevices of wood, who knew someone Can bear my conversations and surreal paradoxes so well, patience of a learned saint. Knitting conclusions, without pricking pain of Needles, a Talisman, when am stuck in Labyrinths or endless road of thoughts.
Roof's gentle caress on my head, as bliss Disappoints by vanishing again, fading greens Of the leaf, feuillemort. Its stairs, like those to Heaven, Peace melts After latent heat of fusion of realization. A cynefin all along, where I balter my heart out, Leaving the worldly worries at the doorstep. Quick rejuvenating nap, in the house's lap, As if quaffing Rodomel, quenches uncertainty. Serendipity splashing from the cerulean hues of walls, for which I thank the 6-years old back timid me, candy floss nostalgia.
It's so heartbreaking to even call our kind 'humans'. We always use it to excuse our mistakes. "I'm only human, I can only take so much." Everything is a lie. We all are liars.. We claim to love God and worship her. It doesn't once occur to us that we lie to our creator as well. We betray her in ways no one else can. She is the creator of this cosmos, and we dare to hurt her creation!? We insult her when we are racist. She gets hurt because we criticize and torture the beings, she created differently than that of us. We hurt God when we commit vile and cruel acts against other species. We hurt her when we value money over nature. She is our mother. She is my mother. And nothing hurts more than hurting your own mother. I'm absolutely disgusted to call myself a human. Because of a bunch of ungrateful imbeciles, my mother is in tears. And I am beyond furious.
#mirakee#writersnetwork Also to my friends here who never fail to praise my works even when sometimes they don't make much sense (even to me) and everyone out there who's dealing with their unheard battles
(If you’re going to read, read the full thing)
The sword which you are now
wielding upon delivering me
grandiose blows is what I used
to protect you. The fact that the
pain I now experience is arbitrary
is oxymoronic and strikes a
different chord of pain in my
body. I’m assessing all possible
scenarios in my head but instead
of providing me a path to heal
I am becoming oblivious to
everything around me and they
spiral around my head, racing
betwixt my foolish heart and
my overwhelmed brain.
The contradictions make
me dizzy and I want to stop. My
tears are frozen midway
by the cold stares I am receiving.
My heart is increasing palpitations
in order to remind me that I am
alive and I wish it wasn’t so. Their
fake sympathy, their words, empty
as air, hover above my head while
exerting pressure at the same time
exerting insurmountable pressure
viz. air. I thought my heart to be
marble but In reality it was just
meagre porcelain. I was so busy
building fortifications that I disregarded
the strength of what I was
protecting. My foolishness
has come to a point where my actions
and counter actions result in the
shattering of more than one heart
and that fact is one of the constituents
of the poison I’m giving myself. I am
ashamed and humiliated of the
thoughts that enter in my brain
and the actions which take place
henceforth. I was told that I
was ‘valued’ ‘loved’ but I’m finding
it impossible to feel that way.
But These icy stares, this fake sympathy,
this despair, this melancholy is exactly
what I deserve. It is useless to try and
feel happiness, for I will begin to have
a thirst for more and this thirst cannot
be suppressed. I’m my own killer, my own
Bonnie or Clyde, my own Frankenstein’s
monster. These thoughts
are digging my grave and preparing
to hurl me into an abyss.
Leave just leave. They cant and won’t
do anything for me apart from fake
f—-ed up sympathy. Just pass me the
pillow and go out the door. It is time
that I breathe again. Will this pass
soon? For god’s sake I don’t know.
But they will just add more flame
to the ravaging fire. So leave. And
let me breathe.
I’m absolutely fine btw.
The last paragraph is inspired by @despair
There's a hurricane of thoughts that run around my not so perfect mind I build and rebuild the memories of my dream last night over a cup of coffee Black and little burnt ,yet I pat my back for making it still better than the last one. I sip with a smirk on my lips and lines of regret over my forehead. There is silence on the nights I binge watch a movie and I think of all good reason my life is exactly like the one in the movie, independent freedom and loneliness lying around the pillows of my bed. I dust them each morning , Moaning to the memories they settle back each night with the tears that burst over them.
I sleep over the drunk thoughts that put you together for one last time and all times you decide to company me along the sadness you left me with.
I gently rub my head thinking about them in all possible ways, I put all the sad metaphors that occurred my way on the bad side of my journal, You and I where never meant to be together there. The agony that came along with them,I slipped them down my throat with a handful full of happy songs I sometimes wish to listen. I carefully place the metaphors that stated love and jotted them down the other side of my journal. Carefully I pick all the words that meant happiness and weaved a poem down to you.
You placed them close to your heart and slipped a fire against the paper, Nothing but ashes defined all the love .
You've now replaced the hurricane of unknown thought to your only thoughts. I'll die to your memories Or live with a mind of war.
I am a child of the earth, made of dust and stars.
I beat the same heart as you. I feel just like you. I have 2 ears, 2 legs, 2 hands, one nose, one mouth just like you. My skin does not define how I am. I’m as beautiful as the white girl from California and brown girl in Punjab.
My skin doesn’t give you the authority to beat me. It doesn’t give you the right to torture me. It doesn’t give you the right to murder me. It,doesn’t make me a monster. It doesn’t make me a criminal. I contribute to society, I pay my taxes I obey the law. Why must I be subjected to different treatment then? Why am I lesser? Why am I cast aside , brutally beaten and tortured?
To the police officers (andalso the other people who killed an innocent black person)
How dare you? How dare you kill an innocent man, choke murder and beat and innocent man, shoot an innocent man becuase his complexion is darker and ignore his pleas? You don’t even deserve to go to Hell. Hell is too good for you all. I never thought I would wish death for a police man, but now I do. You all are despicable and deserve a cursed dog’s death. Yall deserve to be punished cruelly and mercilessly. You all deserve the worst of punishments. Imagine if George Floyd was your father. Imagine if goerge Floyd was your brother. Imagine if George Floyd was your son. Imagine if he was your best friend.
Imagine if he was white.
What would you do then?
Society, Stop avoiding this issue. You are extremly privileged and don’t act like you have nothing to do with this issue. You have created this problem and you have to help fix it.
And finally there are some questions I must pose to you all society.
Why do you think that if somebody’s skin is dark, they deserve to die?
Why can’t you love black people as much as their culture
Why do you want to be back till the police comes.
What’s the difference between black and white?
To the black community
I wish I could tell you how sorry I was. I wish I could, but words fail me. And I’m even more sorry that I couldn’t do justice to the issue.
Please know that I’m with you even though it makes no difference and that you are loved and respected by me ❤️❤️❤️
I’m a mess, so bye for now