shoku_kajimaru

I write poems... And stuff...

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  • shoku_kajimaru 4w

    The Lost Ones

    I can't take the pain
    Of feeling alone,
    Can't take the pain
    Of feelings unshown

    Will it ever get better?
    Will I feel empty forever?
    Will I die in my sleep,
    Cold and alone?

    I'm missing the lost souls,
    The lost ones,
    The ones that got away.
    Those ones are the ones
    That you only wish had stayed

    I need to stop getting caught in my feelings,
    They don't matter,
    Suffering from mental beatings,
    Dragging me down the ladder

    When will the fire stop,
    When will the destruction cease?
    How many more goddamn
    Lives are destined to be deceased?

    I feel like a disease,
    Plaguing those around me.
    I'm a freak, I'm a joke,
    Will anyone finally see?

    I hope they don't see,
    This perfect little fucking tragedy,
    Honestly,
    I could care less about what I am and what I want to be.

    Why do feelings hurt less
    When you believe the lies,
    What lengths will I take
    Before I realize.

    I'm missing the lost souls,
    The lost ones,
    The ones that got away.
    The ones that could've helped,
    The ones that couldn't stay.

    I look around me,
    At the chaos that my existence
    Supposedly created.

    "You're not good enough!"
    "You're stupid for feeling the way you feel!"
    "Why aren't you as smart as your siblings?"
    "It's so EASY!"

    I can't block out the noise,
    I can't block out the voices,
    I try, but I fail,
    Just like everything else.

    This one goes to the lost souls,
    The lost ones,
    The ones that have left,
    Turned to dust.
    ©shoku_kajimaru

  • shoku_kajimaru 11w

    The Hate

    Why do we bleed,
    Why do we feel the need,
    To make other people's problems,
    Only seem,
    Like the biggest deal to us,
    What's this fucking scheme?
    What we need
    Is to stop planting the seed,
    Before it's too late,
    And we can't stop the hate.

    I remember,
    Back in the old days,
    We used to group together,
    Do what each other says,
    But no!
    Now,
    We stand divided,
    By a tidal wave,
    Surrounded on all ways,
    Crashing down on us
    Like it's the end of our days.
    Now if we don't hurry up,
    We'll lose our ways,
    So let's face the fates
    And stop the hate!

    I'm just wondering when
    We will go back to back then,
    When everything was simple;
    "Don't cheat, don't beat,
    Never accept utter defeat,
    Treat others with respect,
    Not with neglect."
    And that's a fact!
    I'm so sick and tired
    Of these idiotic people
    Who think they feel,
    But they don't feel,
    And then they open up the gate,
    And then out comes and flows the hate!

    I swear, nothing ever changes,
    The world, it paces,
    Waiting
    For that chance to grow stronger,
    For that chance to go farther,
    But we people never allow it to succeed and just grow larger!
    We just wait in the darkness,
    Sitting alone and thoughtless,
    Feeling far less,
    Than we ever did and ever will,
    All heartless!
    But today is our time,
    To make it back alive,
    To make it tame,
    To tame the hate!
    ©shoku_kajimaru

  • shoku_kajimaru 11w

    Worthless

    Sometimes I just don't try,
    Barely enough to make it by,
    Short on time,
    Now I'm mortified

    By the the pain not stopping me,
    Help me please,
    I'm going on an Odyssey,
    Just another oddity,
    Oddity 'n abnormality.

    Leave 'em hanging,
    Times are changing,
    Stakes are raising,
    But is any of that fazing?

    No!

    Not at all,
    As the leaves start to fall,
    Each echoes in the hall,
    This is a courtesy call

    To those who are lost,
    You will be found,
    What goes up
    Must come down.
    Hanging on the edge,
    I don't fuck around.

    Don't lose sleep,
    Lose dreams,
    Lose hope,
    It seems

    That nothing even mattered
    In the first place, right?
    So why bother
    Putting up a fight?

    Because deep down,
    I know that someone else
    Was never given a chance,
    Never given a pass,
    Has a fucked up past,
    Flags up at half mast.

    Kneel to the real ones,
    That's an order,
    They'll do more for you
    Than you'd do for them.

    They don't lose hope,
    Lose dreams,
    Lose sleep,
    It seems

    To them that you are worth it,
    So stop acting so worthless.
    ©shoku_kajimaru

  • shoku_kajimaru 11w

    Simple Wish

    Why can't I do anything right,
    Someone hand me the light,
    Lend me the might,
    To make it back alright.

    I'm in danger,
    Don't be surprised if you find me in a hangar,
    Hanging by my neck,
    All hands on deck.

    Tell me how to get to the bottom of this,
    Tell me how to make thoughts of this,
    Tell me how to make it all okay,
    How to be safe in my own place.

    I write when I'm angry,
    I write when I'm lonely,
    I write, then I get scary,
    Oh Lord, please save me!

    Put my thoughts on paper,
    Thinking that one day,
    Maybe later,
    That everything will be okay,
    But who am I kidding,
    Nothing is ever okay!

    The first meet,
    I'm losing sleep,
    Losing track of my dreams,
    Somebody help me please.

    Lord above I,
    I dunno if I can make it,
    I dunno if I can take it,
    I dunno what's really real,
    And what's gone.

    I'm afraid I'm finally losing it,
    Losing hope,
    Losing dreams,
    Got too little time,
    Too many things on my mind,
    I can't take it!

    Fuck sake, look at me,
    All dressed up,
    Dressed down,
    All ugly.

    That fine, because
    Before I die, I have a simple wish;
    I wish all those kiddies
    With fucked up home lives,
    Whose mommy's cry,
    And daddy's said goodbye,

    To keep on going,
    And don't give up,
    You can fix a whole lotta problems
    With just a little bit of love.
    ©shoku_kajimaru

  • shoku_kajimaru 11w

    The End Of The Line

    The end is nigh,
    Truth left to die,
    What happens when
    We get to the end of the line?

    Here comes gravity,
    Coming all up 'n after me,
    I didn't ask for this path
    So don't you dare lie to me.

    When did we ever cry,
    Ever die,
    Stuck on this wave
    Feeling high.

    Higher and higher,
    That's all it's ever been,
    So what happened to
    The times we shared back then?

    Hold on, don't go,
    I'm not done with you yet!
    Press pause, you hogs,
    This is what you guys call a fair bet?
    Nah!

    When did getting older
    Mean getting lonelier,
    Getting phonier,
    Just to get rid of her?

    I don't think so!
    Don't even try to run.
    I know so!
    You can leave when it's all over and done.

    Where did the time go?
    Where did our minds go?
    Why did you lie, no?
    Straight up, talk to me, bro!

    I know you know
    What you've done,
    Now you think that
    You can have some fun?

    Why do you run,
    Why do you hide,
    Could it be because
    Because you're out of time?
    Out of sight?
    Nah, I think it's because
    You think your lips are tight!

    No matter what you think,
    This is the end of the line!
    ©shoku_kajimaru

  • shoku_kajimaru 14w

    Yesterday

    Time gives,
    Time takes,
    Time builds,
    Time breaks.

    Why of all the things
    We could be doing,
    We are doing nothing,
    Never learning?

    We do nothing,
    Until the end of the day,
    Until time slips away,
    And it leads us astray.

    Makes it seem like
    It was only yesterday.

    Only yesterday
    That we were laughing in lunchrooms.
    Only yesterday
    That we were gonna make it out okay.

    Time heals,
    Time kills,
    Time borrows,
    Time steals.

    Of all the things
    We could be doing,
    Why are we stooping,
    The weak ungrouping?

    We hide behind our screens,
    Watching,
    As the world
    Breaks at the seams.

    Makes it seem like
    It was only yesterday.

    Yesterday, when
    We didn't have to
    Fit into a crowd.

    Yesterday, when
    We giggled as
    We were told off for
    Being too loud.

    Reminds me of
    Yesterday.
    ©shoku_kajimaru

  • shoku_kajimaru 21w

    Hopeless

    At night, I look out my window,
    Looking for somebody,
    Someone,
    Something.

    Something to bring back the memories,
    Someone, somebody to actually care.
    Something to hold onto,
    Somebody to see.

    But no one ever sees,
    The true sadness,
    And anger,
    Behind calm eyes.

    No one ever sees,
    Ever sees the hurt,
    The blind,
    The hopeless.

    When the sun comes up,
    I look out my window,
    "Oh, a new day,
    Woo hoo."

    Another day of
    Painful jokes,
    Painful sarcasm,
    Painful life.

    No one ever sees,
    The pain,
    The suffering,
    The torture their words
    Leave on countless victims.

    No one ever sees,
    Ever sees the deaf,
    The invisible,
    The hopeless.
    ©shoku_kajimaru

  • shoku_kajimaru 60w

    Nightfall

    It's funny,
    You know?
    Funny how even when
    You kick me down,
    I still come around.
    How you try so damn hard
    To make my life hard,
    And succeed,
    That I still bleed,
    Even though I don't care what you do.

    And the funniest thing of all?

    I still care about someone,
    Who no longer cares for me at all.

    But, come Nightfall,
    Do you ever remember
    Those good times?
    Maybe. Maybe not.

    You know what I remember?
    Every.
    Single.
    Moment.

    Every good thing that happened,
    Every bad thing that happened,
    All of it.

    And I am still trying to convince myself
    That what happened wasn't my fault.
    That what happened was no one's fault.
    But, that isn't how my mind works.

    Even though,
    Come Nightfall,
    You might not care,
    Nor remember,
    Anything but the bad,
    But I still don't want to blame you.

    And I won't.
    It's just not my nature.
    If there's no one that I want to blame for something,
    Then I'll take it.
    Just like you say I took everything from you.

    You said you wanted to be friends?
    Y'know what, I tried.
    It didn't work, clearly.
    Now you go blaming me for not wanting to be friends,
    Saying that you weren't good enough?
    Huh. Sounds about right.

    I learned at a young age to care, so I care.
    I can't not do that.
    Even when I don't want to.

    Maybe the reason I still think about this is because...
    I pity you.
    I pity you for the sheer fact that you
    Had to blame me.
    You couldn't take a step back,
    And look at the bigger picture,
    And see that it was both of us.

    I really wish that I could say that
    Your words mean nothing at all,
    But wait,
    That would mean I wouldn't care about them.

    But, come Nightfall,
    I assure you that I still think,
    Ponder,
    Wonder,
    Whatever word you want to use,
    About you, even though you probably don't,
    And will never,
    Do the same.

    I hope you become better.
    ©shoku_kajimaru

  • shoku_kajimaru 60w

    There is one major reason I love this song so much; it's simply beautifully worded. Always remember, just because someone who shared the connection of love has left your life, doesn't mean that there aren't others that value you, support, and love you. Thank you Lewis Capaldi for writing this great piece.


    #mirakee

    Read More

    Someone You Loved

    I'm going under and this time I fear there's no one to save me
    This all or nothing really got a way of driving me crazy
    I need somebody to heal
    Somebody to know
    Somebody to have
    Somebody to hold
    It's easy to say
    But it's never the same
    I guess I kinda liked the way you numbed all the pain

    Now the day bleeds
    Into nightfall
    And you're not here
    To get me through it all
    I let my guard down
    And then you pulled the rug
    I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved

    I'm going under and this time I fear there's no one to turn to
    This all or nothing way of loving got me sleeping without you
    Now, I need somebody to know
    Somebody to heal
    Somebody to have
    Just to know how it feels
    It's easy to say but it's never the same
    I guess I kinda liked the way you helped me escape

    Now the day bleeds
    Into nightfall
    And you're not here
    To get me through it all
    I let my guard down
    And then you pulled the rug
    I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved

    And I tend to close my eyes when it hurts sometimes
    I fall into your arms
    I'll be safe in your sound 'til I come back around

    For now the day bleeds
    Into nightfall
    And you're not here
    To get me through it all
    I let my guard down
    And then you pulled the rug
    I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved

    But now the day bleeds
    Into nightfall
    And you're not here
    To get me through it all
    I let my guard down
    And then you pulled the rug
    I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved

    I let my guard down
    And then you pulled the rug
    I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved

  • shoku_kajimaru 71w

    Forbidden

    I look at the world,
    At least, what's left of it.
    The chaos, the brutality,
    Of a world dying from our governments.

    I hear shouting,
    I hear crying,
    I hear the shots of guns,
    I hear explosions...

    And then,
    I heard the worst sound of all.
    Complete, choking,
    Silence.

    I look around,
    The people typing away angrily,
    But in real life,
    Completely silent.

    I wonder if anyone ever laughs anymore,
    I wonder if anyone ever cares anymore,
    It seems like everything good in this world
    Is forbidden.

    Silence is good,
    But like anything,
    Too much of it will kill you.

    Silence from anyone
    Is harmful,
    As silence from you,
    Only hastens the inevitable.

    But,
    Like most things in this world,
    We are, and most likely always will be,
    Forbidden.
    ©shoku_kajimaru