we sang swing low sweet chariot and high to hell just for good measure. i strung up a few strands of lights on the carriage. so that you and i could walk together. always, till eternity. that's what you vowed too right? all tucked up cozy in our compartment jostling side to side. you already knew my secret i just wanted a companion. if you were broken i would have fixed you anew and brought you up to our home. the one we built with virtuous love and promises.
i could not promise peace and sanity but i did promise empathy. does she give you pastries, strong tea and a kiss on your forehead early in the morning like i had been doing? i still sit and scrapbook your present, your future and your past. does she do that too?
you know i still remember that day, when i looked into your eyes. i saw that even death was once alive.
as i rocked our baby in my arms when he was still my Nate not Nathan. below the ancient moon you used to walk past us so quietly. so that you don't perturb him. disturb us. i love his eyes the most because they are cerulean just like yours. Nate heard my every melancholic tale. the hopeless, the lost. all that hung down upon my neck like an iron weighed cross. i wish the disease and desperation of 20 years could shed antediluvian tears.
you know a lot of time has passed but the imprint of the wedding band in still on my ring finger?
the certitude is, dying in your arms doesn't sound like such a good thing anymore. this place was once our sanctuary, you were once my saving grace. you shredded my remaining dignity and made me a disgrace. it wasn't so much what you did. as you were the one to do it. your only explanation to be, you fell out of love. when you left, every morning felt like my mourning day. i felt worthless and stuck up in a loop. as i substantiated my body sinking in the world's throat.
did she cry when she gave up on her soul?
you were my everything, i actually speculated you knew me so well. but i was so wrong because my everything would have heard my cry for help. now i am a ruler of dust, how many deaths have there been before and how many more will there be after me?
you know i'll still love you. atleast till the traces remain.
Shining stars to solacing moon Scorching sun to soothing monsoon Achromic clouds to prismatic rainbows Huge brown hills to lush green meadows Scented primroses to noxious hemlocks Singing cuckoos to dancing peacocks Primitive algae to productive trees Ephemeral oases to eternal seas Sedate snails to swift antelopes Mighty mankind to minute microbes
Everything around is nature! Nature nurtures all her creatures!
It's not a fight of HE vs SHE It's the VICTIM'S fight for safety, To join is our DUTY, To just hear and let it go Is a CHOICE, To come up with a solution Is a SAYING, And to do something is where comes RESPONSIBILITY.
It's been over ages Since opinions are neglected, And voices are muted, The world still goes on , Wars would continue to be fought, Battles would be heard off, Pandemics would come and go, And India would have lost so many soldiers in row, Politics would continue to be the dirty game (no offense) And people, Well they can't get up to be sensible enough To STOP talking about HE and SHE and come up with the concepts of YOU,ME and WE !
When picking the pen was the easiest thing I could do! And not being able to weave words was a tragedy though!
I realised! It's not a teenagers problem you see, It's all about the ill fed mentalities. So who is to be blamed? System? Nah!! Because with system We think about government! We think about administration! We think about management!
But what actual system is?
"To human whims and fancies Is a system made Where law at times break And everything goes to stake!
With desires so high Population so huge Administration faces issues To which we don't even muse
Education can't be blamed And so can't be upbringing wholly Because even the best Can produce the worst.
To wait, It time taking But for the hours need, I see there are voices, So ruffled and muffled , That not a word is clear"
It's high time before we come up with a solution. And that is to respect the opposite gender. To boycott people who think that it is okay to objectify anyone. To curb the evil when the minds are still growing, And socially boycott all those who think it's all OKAY.
WHEN PEOPLE WON'T HAVE ANYONE TO TALK TO , THEY WON'T GET CHANCES TO POLLUTE OTHER PEOPLE'S MIND.
WE HAVE TO MAKE THE OPPOSITE GENDER FEEL SAFE AS WELL AS RESPECTED !!!!!
AND TO THE MINDS WHICH ARE ALREADY SO WILD STRICT PUNISHMENT IS THE ONLY WORD THAT APPLIES!!!!
Actually,.. wrote for my mother when I was really missing her during quarantine... But this is my tribute to the versatile Indian actor ~"THE MAN... THE DREAMER.. THE STAR"- Irfan khan. May his soul rest in peace.
You see, sometimes the music that's played again & again just becomes noise. It's hard for a song to remain a song. Sometimes love letters just become mere random words. It's hard for a promise to remain a promise. Sometimes apologies break people more than they mend them. It's easy for a wound to remain a wound. (Forever) I am strangely obsessed with dead roses now. I wish to carry sunflowers in my pockets. But they suffocate & die. Dandelions in my careless hands got crushed. No wish survives. I am a graveyard. A graveyard of my own dreams. Its broken pieces buried themselves and I bleed wherever I step. A deep deep sigh. The older I grow the more I feel like a lost kid. I can't explain people that brokeness runs in my family. Art is hereditary and so is coldness. You tell me your mother taught you numbers by making you count the stars. Whenever I tell you that you are lucky to have a loving family I'm actually reminding myself how unlucky I am. I don't want to use 'love' & 'family' in the same sentence. I live in a distant past. Flailing for answers only to fetch more questions. A wound never healed smarts again. You don't notice as my heart rips apart. Your sadness has got everything to do with me. But mine got nothing to do with you. You don't like me when I'm sad. So I smile, wondering if you like me at all. Nobody understands me which is to say nobody understands my sadness. You will never know what it's like to be kind enough to listen to everyone but never being brave enough to speak. I find things that might make me numb. But they don't last for long. Do they ever? Does anything ever? Sadness finds me. In movie scenes that are not supposed to be sad. In lyrics of a painless song. In the walls of my perfect "house". In the silence of my "perfect" family. It finds me. It's inside me. I am dragging a meaningless empty existence. I am crying while listening to my favorite songs. I am holding my world together with poorly written sentences I called poetry. But for how long? How long? //I can't do this anymore// ~mahnoor