Just the other day,while cleaning up my house I happened to notice a spider weaving a web and that tiny little creature actually happened to teach me a lesson ...while I was observing it and I noticed how patiently and strategically it was weaving the web and trying to make it as intricate and beautiful as possible just to lure it's prey and survive and truly enough the insect gave in into it's tempting trap and fell prey to it. Teaching me this simple philosophy of life!
Childhood is a beautiful time But,some hardly can live through it Either they go through trauma Or are made labourers Or are just lost But,these scars stay forever and I just hope such persons are healed and loved.
How I fight every night with my emotions Trying to contain them inside and not let a single bit of its contents to burst open.
You know how these silences Of not crying out Whether in poetry or in reality Is really eating me up from the inside?
Did you really have to move on with life and smile with someone new so soon? Don't you remember I pleaded you to give me some time to heal Before you held another hands?
Should I be blamed to label all your feelings about me as "fake"? Tell me should i be?
And do you still remember the day I told you that I'll never again believe in love If we ever said our goodbyes? Well here I am now. Cold, deluded and stoic.
But NO. I won't blame you. Cause I wasn't a perfect lover either I had my flaws and imperfections. And as for the person I am I would like to believe You had your own story Which you couldn't show So I won't blame you.
But the fact that You erased me so soon And fell into someone else's arms Will forever haunt and disturb me for The rest of my life.
But I'll always be good to you. and I'll make sure not a single inch of pain shows up on my face.
Last year when i joined mirakee, i was hurt, depressed, and alone. And past few days are feeling the same. I was looking for a place to let my emotions out because people out of a social app are weird. You see laughing emojis but they are not actually laughing. Everyone's pretending in real life. And behind a screen it doesn't matter. No one judges you whether you laugh or cry. When i told my friends, some really special to me about what i was going through they advised me to let my feelings out. And what's the better way than writing. So i started writing about everything. Everything that i went through and everything i was going through. I speak a lot but only with close ones. When i am hurt, i speak the most. I tell the other person everything that is hurting me and that's the reason why everyone around me knows my weaknesses. Some refuse to tolerate and leave. But some listened, really did listen sagz❤️ ruchi❤️ thank you for being there like sisters. More than my sisters. You know some people say i cry a lot. How can you expect someone after a heartbreak to not cry. I am sorry i am not a robot.
I don't remember when i started writing. I wrote a short story when i was in class 5th or 6th. I love writing short stories. I never knew that writing is my calling. I still don't know. I just love to write. This page i started first on Instagram, and then i found mirakee. Yes it was the most peaceful place for me even better than the real world. I was so hurt and sad that i wanted to talk to anyone. And this place gave me everyone. Friends, sisters, brothers, best friends, supporters, listeners, healers EVERYONE. And they will always remain the same to me no matter what. But this place is no more peaceful for me I love mirakee so much but sometimes for your own peace you have to let go even to the ones you never thought of letting go.
I don't know if i will find peace or not. Because i am broken and yes i accept that i am broken. It's not my fault that people did wrong. But i have paid for the mistakes of others. I have always given too much love and support to everyone i cared about EVERYONE. And have received hatred, ignorance(from most of them). I have paid price for being compassionate. Also i have hurt those who cared about me. Who did everything to support me, stood by me. Came to talk to me when i was alone but i ignored them but they are still the same to me. Even after i have hurt them so much because of my sufferings, they are still the same to me. But i can still not be there for them, not till i am sure that i can give them the love they deserve. Which i cannot right now. A writer expresses every emotion too deeply. Maybe that is why i am not afraid of crying. I am not afraid of opening up in front of people through my write ups. I feel i have so many feelings inside me that are uncontrollable and i have to let them out somehow. That's what i have done always. But not everyone can understand that. Not everyone can stay by your side when you are hurting. People leave. They just leave. Even without giving any reason. And we just have to accept.
There are people who hate me. Like really hate me and i feel sad that they never got the chance to know me. They just listened to what others said and made their decision and left. But i cannot stop anyone from leaving if they don't want to stay. If they judge me by someone's words. And to those who hate me, i have no bad feelings for you. You don't know me, i am not that kind of person who hold grudges for long. Yes i was angry but never meant to hurt anyone. And if i have hurt you too because i was hurting... I AM SORRY. I want you to be happy. You won't believe that but seriously i have no reasons to wish bad for you.
Soon all of my write ups would be gone too. I am deleting them one by one and it feels so heartbreaking to delete them. But i know that i have to. I just don't feel like sharing anything now. I am so sorry everyone who read my write ups that i have to leave. And i don't know if i will ever be back. Maybe never! But thanks always who supported me and were there even when i was gone for a few days.
Goodbye everyone. It was a pleasure knowing you all.☺️❤️
@writersnetwork - I just wanted to say goodbye. You have been very kind and supportive to me ☺️❤️
@ultravioletrays my first friend on mirakee❤️ I don't know you and we haven't even talked much but still i will always remember you❤️
@heart_spills You might be thinking that i forgot you but i haven't ❤️ You were my first supporter here. Thank you so much for being so kind to me❤️
@iharmankaur_ you are such a sweetheart and a gem of mirakee.❤️ Thank you so much for being there always ❤️
@loving_reverie my best friend on mirakee ❤️ she is kind lovely and a beautiful person. I know she is impulsive and does stupid things sometimes but she is weird and that's what i love the most about her❤️ When we first talked on call she couldn't stop laughing. She is always laughing. And if something bad is going on with her you would find her laughing. Such a beautiful person she is❤️ I love you so much h ruchi❤️ I hope everyone gets to know you like i do.
@sagarika_writes she is one of the most beautiful people i know❤️ positive, supportive, always kind. She is not just a doc by profession she is a true healer❤️ there were times when i felt gloomy and so depressed that i didn't wanted to talk to anyone but there she was with her healer❤️ Keep healing like this forever sagz. I love you so much stormborn ❤️
@kinky_eskimo We haven't talked much but she is one person who always have my back i know ❤️ she is one pure soul❤️ Goodbye kinks! ❤️
@zenith_ my sweet sweet arya I have seen you grow here❤️ in front of my eyes. You are a gem of mirakee and you will shine in life. Thanks so much for being my constant ❤️ loads of love from your renu di❤️
@the_unpredictable_taurean when you came here i was so excited ❤️ when you wrote your first write up i felt on cloud 9. Keep writing always❤️ take care I won't say much or you know i'll start crying. I am such a drama. But i am gonna miss you. God bless you. Keep growing in life. And may you achieve all your dreams.❤️
I know i will be gone and no one would remember me after sometime i will become a lost memory. Forgotten. But you all will always be in my heart and this place❤️
In the rush of everyday life, in the haste to blend and flow with reality, we sometimes lose ourselves, our identity. Our minds become numb and we are unable to think. We forget the sole purpose of life, to be happy and to spread the happiness.
The problem with us is that we think we have time. The truth being, we may have anything in this world but time.
"And you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking Racing around to come up behind you again The sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older Shorter of breath and one day closer to death" -Pink Floyd, Time
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