Pen, is a third eye of human being not everyone is lucky enough to open.
This world is invisible for me and most awkward creatures are humans. Seriously they are heartless. but my pen gives me a new life.
I didn't know until my pen collected my broken heart pieces. and started capturing in the pages of the diary.
My pen wrote those words which my heart cannot speak out. It is truly hard to write about yourself, because what goes through the heart, is hard to tell with a tongue. When the tongue stumbles infront of the world. Then the pen and the pages of the diary speaks louder.
Six-hundred pages of the diary filled with innocent emotions, feelings,love, hate and untold pains of the life. my pen inks out my heart and my mind. My pen makes the universe easier to read me.
When I was 3 I used to hold the pen for scribbling and all the four walls of my house were so colourful.
When I was 5 I used to hold the pen to write my name on my hands, and i used the nib of my pen to prick my older siblings. they pardoned me cause I was too younger for them.
When I was 10 I used to hold the pen for making myself educated. where i civilized what's the importance of pen, a drop of ink can change the whole destiny in your favour.
When I was 15 I used to hold the pen to face other challenges of the life to mould myself in a better way. And the dream I saw with open eyes I want to turn them into reality.
When I was 17 I used to hold the pen, to pen down what was in my mind. scribbling with my thoughts. As all know the blood of the youngsters is hot. Madness to get something. Doesn't matter! if its good in your favour or not.
Teenagers aren't able to understand anyone that they believe what other say and they are ready to prove themselves right. if they're walking in a wrong path too. this is the age where youngsters can make they future bright by choosing right path. We should realise what the time and age wants to teach us.
When I turned 20 believe me I ain't hold the pen, pen holds me. after i stood up with the most heartless creatures of the world here! I stop believing myself too cause I'm also a human I too have a heart. I was lost in myself thinking did I also hold the useless power of breaking someone's heart. knowingly or unknowingly if I hurt someone will they pardon me in this live?
This thought was making me sick mentally. I knew when I was in teenage I hurt my parents and my loved ones too. Hope they pardon me before I die.
I learned to walk by holding the finger of my parents, but the pen held my hand at that time when my heart could not speak out. when I was screaming, my pen encouraged me to use her ink to pen down what was in my mind and does my heart agrees with it or not. And my pen knows everything that I ain't waste a single drop of ink.
I merely feel alive these day's, don't know what I have lost, but feels like something valuable can't be defined. I know there is nothing much to worry, but i do, as you know i do worry a lot. You were by my side a year ago, to hold when can't stand or when i fell apart and maybe i didn't realize that time. But now i feel the difference. You should have called me, these many months. But you never did, and maybe you know i won't answer them. I'm so sorry!
"Sorry" is a very small word to the hurt i gave you.. But you say "it is not required, but your smile clears everything" you're extremely kind. What to even say, Most of the time i feel, i don't deserve you, neither your kindness!
But now i needed you, much more than anytime. I opened the book which you recommend when we were together. I started reading it, and the memories started to flash one by one.. our midnight talks, hiding from friends, meeting in the library, bunking classes together. And without thinking twice i dialled your number. Do you know how it feels? To talk to the closest person of your life, after so many months. I should be excited, but nah, Instead I feel peace. within 2 rings you accepted my call. For one minute i was silent, what should i say? But you like always lift the conversation. nothing new i felt Talking to you, it's like we never had a break.
Things changed, new people entered in this break, in your life and my life aswell. But the question is did they replace me? You seemed NO but deep down i felt YES. And that is obvious! Wanted to run back to you, but i couldn't.. Let the thing's remain as such, i said i'm feeling good, how much ever i pretend you have learnt it's a lie. And That is enough, to say, you are still the past you, Yes, for me you're the same.
Let this distance be as such,. Something's are ment to be love eachother from the distance but never unite, Like moon adores stars but they cannot touch eachother...