I miss those days , when Bags were heavy , not hearts Pencil were broken , not promises Tears were fake , not smiles.
So beautiful day .It was achan and Amma's wedding anniversary. And I wished and literally I woke up early today was to just be with ammu getting updates on ammus cooking schedule she was cooking today. Then everything was happy and happening Even like Ammu and I played uno. Ammu send her ghee rice pics and all. Also Ammu wrote assignment and gave to me. We were happily being. Ammu said let's play a game. I said yes chalo. So I downloaded some this or that images and some questions and we were playing. One image of this or that same to same like how ammu ticked even I ticked. And next one Ammu left two blank I said Ammu you should tick all Ammu that's the rule. Coz even I was playing here together even I was ticking. All of a sudden I don't know what happen .Ammu was in anger. Randomly she send two images of ticked answers And it was like now are you happy I have sent it bye. .I really don't know why . She was telling sorry that I played or asked to play my bad that this. .I'm like was the rule I said was the reason or the questions there in the image. I really don't know what ; Before I could say ammu just a fun game why are you getting so into it. Ammu was telling my bad I asked you to play I'm not playing anything and all. I said tell what you want to tell I'll listen what else can I do. When she is not listening Ammu said good night. So even I said good night and a sorry. .Again Ammu said I got it thanks. And emoji I said that smile emoji I don't know what's written there .if there is something tell Ammu. Ammu all of a sudden I don't know from where This is what you wanted Alle go post it. I'm like what is ammu saying . What to post what did I want. I'm really not getting. I don't know. Was that question or what I said Ammu it's rule you need to fill everything or don't know what made it like this. I didn't go on giving mouth back. I just agreed to whatever Ammu said. If I ask questions why what when and all it'll just pull and go. So. .left that there itself. Simply why fighting and all. Even if it's a fight I'm ready to say sorry in the beginning itself. I don't wanna drag and go. If ammu says I don't wanna talk coz I have created all this. Even I'm ready for that to be silent. Simply be a headache and stand there it's not good Alle. Ada. What Ammu says I'll do it.
Days back. I had a call on my phone. Which was at 6:00am in the morning I woke up on that day at 12:30pm .It was almost afternoon. I called back to the number abd wasn't answer. Yes it was Ammu. Later that day when we spoke by 4:00pm or so I asked Ammu what happened. She said nothing da Her voice trembled but hesitate. Call hang out. I sent a message and asked her what happen . She said nothing. Rang a call Ammu said yes I wasn't well from past four days. I could sense the care in me. I trembled I was in fear as I heard that. No matter what if your love is true once if that bonding is done. I swear on god you can't get out of it. I hadn't spoke to her 5 days back. Because ammu avoided me. So I myself was silent. When you hear that she wasn't well. How cold hearted or stone hearted guy I was . It starting melting. Yeah manh. The connections we make are true. I realised it again. But what to do I can't say anything to ammu know. Then past 2 days ammu taught me maths and everything. Also she is fine with her health issue. Yesterday it was so beautiful . Playing knock knock and noodles mande videos and all. Really beautiful. Let's see where it goes. The only thing is that I need to be strong enough the listen to anything that happens and I could listen to in my love life. God bless her.
My eyes will rememberHow to love the worldUnder the changing skies When the light changes So does the view .
It's fine da. It's also ok to not be ok. Like if ammu doesn't need me. It's not the end of everything .I'll still love , also she has given me many things to love her till the end. When no one not even ammu was there to wish luck , I just had a piece of wipe she used to tell everything that she could. Yes Da it's like , she has given me wonderful times the memories are the part of everything I could fall in love again and again .
I'm still very proud to say Yes I love her. I can clearly say with everything each and every feelings I have. It is not infatuation but it's love .Today even tomorrow even ages to come .I'm proud to say I love her. Yeah it is my very own Ammu Whom I loved and whom I still do.
Love sees clearly But infatuation is blind , when it gains sight it's dies. Ammu had said to me in the phone call " It just was infatuation on you akshi ". I still remember Because this was that statement that had hit hard on me. The caring nature , the willing to share everything etc Was that called infatuation Ammu. I could have questioned but couldn't. I had no words.
Come on let me tell you all a joke. You know what When is that moment I feel that I have become old. .It's when my blue underwear turns grey I feel I'm Using them from years da
Can you force someone to love you ? Can you force someone to be your friend ?Can you force someone to text you ? Can you force someone to care for you ?Can you force someone to cry for you ? Can you force someone to smile for you ? Can you force someone to lie for you ? Can you force someone to trust you ?
Never hide yourself from what you are Or change yourself for just being with others. Stay the way you are , if they like you they'll stay if they don't they'll fly away. Respecting what you are is the one gratitude you can show to yourself. Thoughts , words anything can change you. But situation and experience could tell you what's right and what's wrong.